I hate thinking about my teeth.
I try to treat them well. I don’t brush them as often as I should, but I brush them enough. They are a touch yellow, but that’s what 21 years of smoking will get you.
I keep thinking that they will rot, though. One will come loose. An old filling might fall out. I have some as yet unknown abscess, and the lurking infection is poisoning my brain or my heart. The damage is irreparable. I will die. Or, at the very least, the disease will eat its way into my inner ear and leave me dizzy and falling forever and ever.
That really happened to a woman who a friend of mine used to work with. She never went to the dentist, and a tooth infection destroyed her inner ear. She was found lying flat out on the floor by her desk, unable to stand up, with her world stuck in a permanent spin.
I am terrified of the dentist, though. Even writing those seven words in that last sentence sent a burning sensation running over my head and neck. I haven’t been to one in at six years.
Truthfully, I would prefer to have no teeth at all. I used to fantasize about being put under and having all of my teeth pulled out and permanent dentures drilled into my jaw. No teeth equals no dentist. This is how great my fear is. I am so afraid of dentists that this sounds like a reasonable solution.
When I was in my early 20s, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. It was done over two visits. During the first visit, the freezing wouldn’t take. It’s a problem I have. I am somewhat impervious to dental anesthetic.
After more than ten needles in my lower jaw, I could still feel pain when they started to pull on my teeth. My dentist, an evil bitch who clearly thought that I was just being difficult, instructed two assistants to hold me down on the chair. She yanked my teeth out of my head anyway.
Medieval torture, anyone? To this day, I think I should have sued. If you are planning on seeing a dentist with the last name of, and I am not kidding, Hertz, cancel your appointment. I spent two days gulping down painkillers and alternating between crying hot tears into my pillow and sleeping through complete emotional exhaustion.
What I’m saying is, I think I have post traumatic stress disorder from that damnable dentist.
Back in the day, when I was a naïve little kid who loved to pick out her very own jeweled rings from the receptionist’s desk after getting a filling, I had not yet plumbed the depths of pain and fear brought on by forcible and unanesthetized tooth extraction. Now I have, and there is no unknowing what it is like to have one’s arms held down by hefty dental assistants while a sadist tears bone out of your face.
Why am I telling you all of this? No reason, really. I’m just spending some time worrying about how my heart will die because of an abscessed tooth I will never know about BECAUSE I WILL BE DEAD FROM MY DEAD HEART.
Thank you, Dr. Hertz. I am forever indebted.
Photo Credit
Mouthful © Shmutzie @ Flickr. Some Rights Reserved.
Jade Wu says
I thought I was the only one with ptsd from the dentist. It was from my childhood the dentist had me held down by all his assistants a bitch assistant came to yelling at me to shut up and stop crying. And the the dentist worked on me while I was screaming and crying. Still traumatizes me to this day I went to a new office after that but then I witnessed my brother being dragged back to the chair as he ran away and his screams were heard in the living room I burst into tears as I heard them. I have horrible anxiety around people working in dentistry I also had bad experiences in doctors offices as well so trust issues with medics especially doctors no matter what doctor.
Tina@Send Chocolate Now says
I used to be just like you! I was terrified of the dentist. Now, I have one that is worth his weight in gold, and that’s just about what I pay him.
I had great teeth until my third child, then they all fell apart. I had an abscess a few years ago, and I have never felt pain like that before. Ever. I would NOT recommend getting to that point. And of course, it happened on a Friday. Now, two teeth pulled, two crowns and a bridge and Invisilign later…I am a happy person with happier teeth.
Finding a dentist that you like and trust is the key. And, making yourself get over your fear. You CAN do this, Schmutzie!
Tina
MayB says
I’m pretty sure she went to the same dental school as my evil dentist, Dr. Weiss. He did the same to me when I got my molars pulled. Afterwards, I managed to get into the house before crumbling in a sobbing mess on the front mat.
I join you in the want having dentures instead of teeth. It really does seem simpler.
Val says
Have you looked into sedation dentistry. It’s different than the “freezing” and “drugging” they used to do. You’ll need to have someone responsible for getting you home, as you’ll be sedated but good, but, they can check out your teeth and you won’t remember a thing.
Just a thought.
I hate the dentist too. One bad experience after another, until I found my current dentist. Thank the good Lord for him, now i can get my teeth cleaned and fixed properly, and while I do still have quite a bit of anxiety over it, I know that it is not going to be as bad as I fear.
Good luck.
coffeewithjulie says
What a Nightmare! (But you’d be surprised up nice and comfty some dentist offices can be these days … televisions, flavoured fluorides.)