No beatin’ around the thesis bush (no pun intended) today: With every passing rotten natural development that befalls the human body, from adolescence to death, females suffer in extreme disproportion to men.
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Nest Evacuation, 1 of 4: Spring Training Report
Here we are, nearing the end of the second semester of the first year of the first of our four children’s evacuation from the nest. I didn’t write about the halfway point, in January, because I didn’t feel like wallowing. Now, I’m in the post-spring-break funk.
Safewords for Everyday Situations
I’m getting right to the point; no beating around the bush (pun intended). The world needs safewords in everyday situations—now more than ever. To be clear, I’m brand spanking new to the whole concept of safewords, but I know there’s no wading in gently, and by gently, I mean very painfully.
Verbal Turducken: It’s What’s for Dinner
Don’t wait until the last minute to plan your meal, from menus to which flavor of pain you are in the mood for this year. In-laws or immediate family? Siblings or cousins? Neighbors or workmates? Ham, or turducken (a turkey, stuffed with a duck, that’s been stuffed with a chicken.)
(Some Kind of) Santa is Coming to Town!
Here we are, up to our aspics in the holiday season. Most of the country is still high on Black Friday savings from all those zeros we rolled up and smoked (legally) after not handing them over to store clerks for slippers, scarves, and waffle irons. What an amazing time of year. Puff, puff, save!
Scratch That: How to Make Homemade-ish Meals that Satisfy
I like to cook. But I’m a busy person. For most of my meals, I try to come up with something that’s made from scratch, with ingredients that were grown, and/or raised humanely. I stay away from overly processed foods about 90% of the time. Here’s a few examples of my most popular half-scratch meals.
Easy, Fast and Delicious, Just Like the Cook!
Regardless of what kind of job you have, getting dinner on the table when you are a busy parent is no easy task, but it’s not impossible. I also cook from scratch as much as possible. Here’s a few tips on how to get homemade-ish meals on the table that your family will love.
Scone Cake: I meant to do that!
This morning, I got out of bed. To make matters worse, I decided to bake something, at the ungodly hour of 6:30 a.m. I hate baking for one reason: I don’t like to measure. I’ll make a sauce, throw together a stew or soup, all without benefit of measuring a single thing.
The Surreal Housewife: I Want my High Chair!
We recently got a new favorite toy in our household. I know that some families get jet skis, or multi-room tents, but we got a recliner. Yes, we’re an active, healthy family, but like the Most Interesting Man in the World says, “I don’t always lie around, but when I do, it’s in a vegetative state.”
The Surreal Housewife: The Last Word
Why leave it to your grieving relatives, who will be furiously looking for your will, to make important decisions? Regardless of how comfortable you are thinking about your own demise, isn’t it your responsibility? And besides, wouldn’t it be nice to have the last word, once and for all?