Since everything was unpredictable when I was growing up, I had poor benchmarks for knowing what normal households looked like.
I used to think in absolutes a lot – I’m right, you’re wrong – and if you disagreed, I would defend my position without compromise.
As a child, if I admitted to anything it could lead to painful consequences, so I learned to lie if confronted, which I had to overcome as an adult.
I had a friend who would impose on me to help him with his house projects, and I had to finally realize he was taking advantage of me, and stop doing it.
Today let’s talk about finishing things. Has it ever felt like you struggled to finish things – an assignment at work, a fixit project at home?
I learned as a child not to talk about what happened inside my household, and had to learn to break that cycle as an adult.
At times I would let people get close, then push them away when I would get scared – triggered by the chaotic events of my childhood.
Have you ever felt like you’re out of step with the world around you?
I was trying to control my world like I couldn’t control the alcoholic family of my teenage years.
A tangible benefit of writing memoir is catharsis – in sharing the story, to feel the events – and in some way, be able to let go of the emotional charge.