Cancer treatments have come a long way, or so I am told. I am not so sure this is true. I see a tremendous difference in my husband’s energy level and in his strength. It used to be me that was always trying to catch up to him, but not anymore.
When, at the funeral home, I reached out to say goodbye, I noticed the watch he was wearing was right on time. I don’t know what that means in a timeless world, but he was more interested in who you were… in the here and now.
Perhaps this dis-ease stems from the honest search for wellness itself, in a world which ceaselessly pushes us to behave like selfish ingrates, or like metaphorical ‘dragon-chasing’ addicts, rather than encouraging us to simply be at peace with who we are and what we have.
I sure wasn’t ready for that, just as I am sure most people aren’t ready for this kind of thing to happen. Nobody prepares for these things, they just sort of happen. One day life is normal and one day it isn’t.
They had expanded several sizes, along with the rest of me. I was no longer the young, thin curvaceous chick. It seemed my body was going through yet another drastic change. Having had two children by this time, I realized something had to be done with all the weight I carried in front of me.
Finally, “just do it”; but, don’t expect a reward, recognition or even a “thank you”. It’s a funny thing about human nature in resenting help: perceived charity is hard to swallow. Sometimes you stand alone – it’s okay.
I’m always slightly embarrassed to admit that I never quite got the hang of skiing, despite spending hundreds of hours on the slopes. Some people think it’s a waste that I was there a whole year and am not on my way to the Olympics.
That which whispers louder can be more persistent than the things which are ‘already figured out’. And I’ve noticed the uncomfortable ‘mind spin’ tends to seep in at times when we are most vulnerable.
Between the shoulder prime number whisperings of the Devil and God, between the monster fear multiplier and it’s palindrome C.O.D (RETSNOM is a brilliant puzzle game that will have you thinking hard about what to do next), is you …
Let’s know ourselves enough to feel content with how we spend our time and not make ourselves feel guilty. We already know deep down and have the right to say yes or no, to give ourselves permission and not have to wait on someone else to say so.