Keeping a journal or diary can give you deep insights into your life, in good times and difficult times.
One childhood pastime many children have engaged in at some point or another is keeping a diary. Some of us dabbled; others wrote our little hearts out religiously. Out of those dedicated to daily “Dear Diary” entries, some have even considered that book of blank pages their only true “friend,” a place where thoughts, feelings and even secrets were shared and entrusted. As anyone knows, growing up is not an easy time for many people. Sometimes, keeping a diary is the only thing that keeps people going, serving as a healthy outlet to purge teen angst.
Personally, I was a dabbler. Not fully grasping the benefits of writing my thoughts, I just wrote the odd thing here and there but nothing major or significant. For the most part, I was one of those kids who suffered in silence, keeping everything brewing inside. It wasn’t until much later in life that I took to keeping a diary, or journal, as I prefer to call it.
About a decade ago a small group of friends and I decided to commit to reading The Artist’s Way by Julie Cameron. For those of you unfamiliar with this amazing book, it is a 12-week personal development program designed to tap into and rediscover your creativity. Each of the 12 chapters in the book has a set of exercises. As a group we made a commitment to support each other through the process by meeting every Sunday to share and discuss what we had discovered and experienced during the week.
One of the ongoing exercises we had to absolutely commit to doing was something called “the morning pages”, which was basically waking up every morning at least half an hour before we normally would start our day and simply sitting and writing three full pages of “stream of consciousness.”
Writing in a “stream of consciousness” means just letting whatever comes to mind out on paper — without editing, without censoring or judging, without paying any attention to spelling mistakes or grammar, without crossing things out or even really thinking about what to write. It’s just simply letting whatever needs to come out to be expressed uninhibited by self-judgment or negative criticism.
You would think that this might be a simple enough task. However, imagine having to get up earlier than usual when you are not only NOT a morning person but a “snooze” button fiend to boot. And then having to sit and write three full pages of whatever, everyday for the next 12 weeks. That’s three whole months! That’s 84 days!
“That’s insane!!” I thought to myself. “I can’t do that!” Now, had I been doing this book on my own I would have turfed the idea before it had even begun. In fact, I had attempted it the year before and made it a little less than a quarter of the way through. This time, however, I had back up. There were eight of us committed to suffering the same fate and supporting each other through this 12-week process.
For most of the first week I found myself angry at having to do this. “This is stupid!” I thought. “I don’t know what to write! I have nothing to say! This is pointless, I could totally be sleeping right now!” But I had made a commitment to seven other people who were all counting on me to be a part of this. So I forced myself to get up early, sit and write… or “put up and shut up!” as the saying goes.
Such harsh words, hey? Yeah, that was me during my negative phase of life — I was a “glass half-empty” kind of gal back then. Thankfully, one of the many valuable bits of wisdom I have learned over the years is that gentler self-talk is more effective to encourage and motivate me to move forward. Thus I created a more positive expression for myself to use instead. Accompanied by a few deep breaths, I now say, “Let go and let flow.” Ah yes, that’s much better!
During most of that first week —I kid you not, I actually sat writing the same sentence over and over. “I don’t know what the #@*& to write! I don’t know what the #@*& to write! I don’t know what the #@*& to write!” Three whole pages worth every morning for almost five days. Suddenly, half way through day five’s entry of “I don’t know what the #@*& to write!” it began to pour out of me. Just random thoughts at first. Some creative in nature, others more personal. Once the personal flood gates were open, a torrent of pent up emotion began to cascade out onto the blank pages before me.
Tears streamed down my face as this cathartic release opened the door to my soul. Needless to say, I wrote way more than three pages that morning. WOW! Who knew? I certainly didn’t. And believe me, I fought it most of the way, until I just couldn’t fight it anymore.
That was the beginning for me. At long last, I had found an outlet for my adult angst. Those amazing 12 weeks came and went and yet I continued to spill out my guts into this inanimate object full of bound paper — sharing and entrusting my thoughts, feelings and even secrets with my new “friend.”
Journalling has been my saviour in many respects. I didn’t realize how invaluable it has been to me until years — and many journals — later I discovered what a powerful tool for personal development journalling actually can be.
Sure it was a healthy outlet for me to finally let out so much of what I had been harbouring for so long, but it was so much more than that. It was, and is, a chronicle of my personal journey. It contains a wealth of knowledge and insight into my experience as a human — my pains, my sorrows, my fears and insecurities, as well as my joys, my loves, my triumphs, my sketches and creative ideas and most importantly, my growth.
Happy soul searching!
Please check back tomorrow night at 9pm PST for Part 2 of my article on Journalling.
Photo Credits
“A new day, a new journal” amy.september @ Flickr.com. Creative Commons. Some Rights Reserved.
“What’s Sexy Journaling” Original Bliss @ Flickr.com. Creative Commons. Some Rights Reserved.
“new year, new journal” jawcey @ Flickr.com. Creative Commons. Some Rights Reserved.
[…] This is Part Two of Kylen’s article “The Art of Journalling”. To read Part 1, please vist this link. […]