If we want our relationships to truly succeed, then we need to follow the golden rule, which is to treat others how we would like to be treated. When either one of you discovers that you aren’t connecting or treating each other right, then it is time to find a solution, and couples therapy may be exactly what you need.
Couples therapy can truly help because it is a forum where you and your significant other can truly speak to one another and get to the bottom of your issues. If you would like to learn more, then read on to understand what couples therapy is all about and how it can improve your relationship.
What Is Couples Therapy?
The purpose behind couples therapy is to sit in a neutral place with a neutral therapist and drill down on why you are having problems in your relationship and how you and your loved one can fix the issues that you may be bringing to the table. Couples therapy may not be the only solution (more on that later), but it can be a big piece of the puzzle. Counseling is likely one of the reasons that the divorce rate has decreased over the years.
Therapy sessions typically occur in an office because the therapist can ask you questions while also watching your body language and how you both interact with each other outside of your home setting. The therapist will gauge your answers and your behavior and try to help you talk out your problems. It is a process that will likely take several sessions.
While in-person counseling is the norm, as technology advances, teletherapy is also becoming more popular, though it does have its pros and cons. On the good side, you are still talking to a professional about your problems. However, some couples may not feel like they are getting the help that they need when they hear from a counselor on a screen. However, it is an option if you cannot get out of the house.
While it may seem daunting at first, it is important to keep in mind that you don’t need to be on the verge of a breakup or be at each other’s throats all day in order to get help. Instead, the best time to go to couple’s therapy is when you still get along, and you want to get a tune-up to ensure that your relationship stays strong. Another great time to go is before you get married so you can ensure that your relationship will stay healthy through this new transition.
What Couples Therapy Could Look Like
An important thing about therapy that many people may not realize is that there are several different approaches to counseling that you may see during your session.
One of the most popular forms is cognitive therapy, where the therapist will ask what is troubling you and provide tips on how to manage those difficult emotions. Another common form of couples therapy is the Gottman Method. This is where you and your significant other will provide research about one another, including specific behaviors like criticism and defensiveness, and then the therapist will try to sort through the issues.
So, what should you expect during your therapy sessions? During your initial sessions, the therapist will learn about your lives and your relationship. These questions may include details about your love life, your family history, your childhood, and more. It is all necessary information that the therapist can use to learn about you both as people and the solutions that may fit your particular scenario.
Then, your therapist will likely set goals and create a timeline of when you should meet them. These will likely be smaller, more manageable goals, like apologizing more often or showing more affection. Then, as each session comes along, you will show how you are growing, and the sessions will evolve from there. In order for therapy to work, you both must be open and honest every step of the way.
Other Ways To Strengthen Your Bond
As you can see, couples therapy is a process that works if you are dedicated to success, but there are also other ways that you can strengthen your relationship. You can try these tactics as a substitute or a supplement to therapy, and you may see an improvement.
One tactic is to stay together and try to take time to have romantic dates and adventures so you can bond as you did in the past. If you are low on funds, then there are many budget-friendly date ideas, including hiking through the nature preserve, having a picnic at the park, or just staying home and cooking dinner together.
Another way that you can connect is by making an attempt to show interest in your partner’s hobbies. Whatever the activity might be, give it a chance. You never know if you might enjoy it, and your partner will appreciate your effort. You can also try to perform small acts of kindness for your partner, like making breakfast or sending a nice email during their work day. These small behaviors can make a major difference.
In the end, there is definitely a purpose to couples therapy, and it could do wonders for your marriage or dating life. Consider attending a session, and see how therapy can improve your relationship.
Photo Credit
Photo by Imam Fadly on Unsplash
Guest Author Bio
Jori Hamilton
Jori Hamilton is a writer and journalist from the Pacific Northwest who covers social justice issues, healthcare, and politics. You can follow her work on twitter @HamiltonJori, and through her portfolio at Writer Jori Hamilton.
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