When I was a young singer I went to a lot of jam sessions. Jams are great for meeting other musicians, learning how to improvise, and how to communicate with other players. You get up onstage with other ‘jammers’ who you’ve never rehearsed with, you decide on a tune and a key, and then you give your chops a spin!
I learned a lot this way, but there was one jam session in particular where I learned something unexpected.
I got up onstage and sang an old blues song. I remember feeling relaxed and spontaneous with my interpretation, and the groove was in the pocket. It was fun. When I got offstage I took a seat at the bar, and some girl came up to me and asked, “How do you do that?”
“How do I do what?” I responded, unaware of what she was referring to.
“How do you get up onstage knowing everyone is judging you, criticizing what you’re wearing, analyzing every note – tearing you apart?”
I was silent for a minute because I was still taking in what she’d said. I realized I was completely oblivious to the audience’s judgment of me. Maybe that was naive, but it had never occurred to me before.
I wasn’t offended by her remark, nor did I assume she was criticizing me directly. (Who knows, maybe she was!) Rather, it made me realize that for some reason, I’d never learned to be fearful of getting up onstage.
Maybe my ingrained confidence came from the early childhood experience of entertaining my neighbours and cousins on the backyard stage. I didn’t grow up with television – my imagination found an outlet in making up songs, scenes and stories, and broadcasting them live from under the cedar trees that lined the borders of our cottage property, deep in the woods of British Columbia. It seemed the most natural thing in the world to communicate this way. Some performances got more jubilant reactions than others, which may have bombed, but the varied responses all seemed to be part of the fun.
As I got older, I learned that we all judge each other to some degree. But since I’ve always been naturally inclined toward seeing the good in others and noticing their strengths, I must’ve assumed that others did the same for me.
I still don’t worry much about what others think. My career path and life have been so unconventional that I wouldn’t expect anyone to understand. What matters is that we all have the courage to get up there and do our thing: whatever it is that makes us feel alive.
What makes you feel alive, in spite of what others might think?
Photo Credits
Photos by David Ruiz – All Rights Reserved
Guest Author Bio
Nancy Ruth
Nancy Ruth is a Canadian-born singer, songwriter, and recording artist. A world traveller with a powerful stage presence, she comes alive as she cooks up a very tasty brew of jazz, Latin, and flamenco. Her Spanish roots led her to Málaga, Spain, where she now resides and finds creative inspiration for her songwriting, weaving her influences in the Mediterranean breeze.
Visit her website: Nancy Ruth
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I do perform regularly with our band, though not at your amazing level of talent and creativity, Nancy! But getting up in front of people, whether to speak or perform, is definitely a challenge for the nerves, especially the first few times… and for some, always. Some very famous artists have said they are always nervous when they go out on stage. It’s understandable. It’s one of the few situations where you literally have a spotlight on you with 10s, 100s, or 1000s of people staring at you. You’re under the microscope and your viewer has high expectations. But is the experience all bad? NO! In fact, the reward is (most often) worth it. I always feel such a sense of accomplishment if we pull of a great show, and have fun doing it. This means learning how to relax and enjoy it. As you say, Nancy, sometimes a person just has ingrained confidence due to a lifetime of experience. I think you need a good dose of ego to do it… and that’s not a bad thing. You need confidence and ego to express yourself, and be true to the belief you have in the music you’re doing … or the speech you’re giving, etc. Ego and talent make you unique. That’s what people are there for, to be entertained by someone uniquely qualified to deliver a show. Confidence is something that developed over time for me. I’m not saying I never get nervous now, but I try to keep that attitude of ‘work enough on your art so you can deliver a good performance, then get out there and just HAVE FUN’…. that will really come across to the audience and, in turn, that is what will energize you AND them.
Great story. I just think watching your videos you always seem to be in the zone. You are a natural performer & have a Great feel for music in many genres. You seem to work with & understand other musicians in stinctively. Because you have flair & appeAr so confident & comfortable I’m what you do it allows the audience to relax & enjoy the performance.I think the performances recently in the castle were so amazing ,& all of you commented each other so well. Such a generic & polished Band!
An important point for any performer to think about, and for some, I’m sure it isn’t always easy. I enjoyed the read, thank you…and the last line has me thinking 🙂