Last week, Sylva Ifedigbo shared a personal challenge he has with public speaking and offered some hints on how he is working to overcome it. His story brought back a memory to me which I want to share with you.
Years ago, I attended a four-day conference put on by the now defunct Digital Equipment Corporation, AKA DEC. It was a sales and marketing conference attended by sales reps and managers from Canada and the United States. I was the Western Canadian sales manager for DEC’s PCBU. I can’t remember the exact number of people attending but I would guess it was well in excess of 700 people, perhaps as many as 1000. Much of the time there was spent in break-out sessions going over the features and benefits of some soon to be released products and becoming acquainted with the marketing initiatives aimed at promoting these new entries into our marketplace.
The company had also planned something else. Two of the days included lengthy sessions in a large auditorium with everyone in attendance. These sessions were billed as ‘games’ and mimicked a Roman Olympic theme. The first day featured a very convincing cardboard chariot in the middle of the stage. The ‘teams’ consisted of individuals from each region selected by higher management to represent their respective regions in the games.
Everyone entered the large hall and took their seats. As this was being held in the US, the host country being gracious, decided to allow the Canadian contingency to go first. Our Canadian General Manager, also gracious, decided that I should go first. After thanking him with the most incredulous look I could muster, I walked the long aisle-way to the front of the hall and climbed the three steps that led up to the stage. Once there, I was directed to stand behind the chariot and was handed a wireless microphone.
Looking out over the audience, I saw an ocean of my peers. Above them, suspended from the high ceiling was an aluminum bar holding a dozen or so spotlights pointing at the stage. To the left of the audience stood a camera man and next to him, a sound engineer. This was all being recorded and the CEO of the company was in attendance flanked by his management team. Higher echelons were watching! To my left, about 20 feet away was a table behind which sat five judges who were to score each of our ‘performances’.
The first game was simple enough. It relied on a scenario we often use in sales training.
“What if you had one minute to convince an important decision maker that doing business with your company is the best choice.”
The MC announced my name to the audience then looked at me and said:
“Gil, you just stepped into an elevator and recognized that you are with the President of Harley Davidson who you know is close to deciding on who his technology partner will be for the next 5 years. You also know that it’s between Digital, and IBM. You are on the first floor and you notice that he is going to the 15th, about a one minute ride.”
He then hands a microphone to my Californian counterpart who is standing in front of the chariot and playing the part of Harley Davidson’s President. He has one thing to do, namely, ask me a question.
“Gil, why is your value proposition better than IBM’s?”
I have often spoken to a crowd, some as large as this one, but I always had time to prepare. This was a challenge and I will be honest, I was grateful for the chariot. My knees were shaking!
I love an icebreaker, so I looked out at the audience and quoted the Dry Ideas tag line …
“And never let them see you sweat …”
I then launched into my pitch as best I could. When it was done, I looked over at the judges who held up score cards. [6.5] … [8.5] … [7.5] … [9] … [5] … my final score was tabulated as a 6.5
Despite the warm ovation, I returned to my seat, somewhat deflated.
~
Day 2 – How To Break A Rep
The next day, there were different games. Once again, my General Manager chose me because apparently the fellow who was slated to speak had sprained his wrist. This person was sitting beside me. To this day I have no idea how a sprained wrist would hamper ones ability to speak, but, there it is.
Once again I took to the stage but this time with a team member from two other regions. On the left of the stage were three easels each with a large white writing pad and a felt marker. We were each given a topic and two minutes to scribble down some thoughts. Then, one by one, our job was to stand in the middle of the stage and wax poetic for two minutes about our given topic. My topic was “Client-Server” but today, I would be the second speaker.
The woman who would go first was a sales representative from Texas. She was absolutely terrified. With moist pleading eyes, she looked at me and told me as much.
“I’m fine one on one, or even one on five … but this …”
I spent my two minutes coaching her as best I could. I told her to keep moving, don’t stand still, pace your talk, breathe, trust your knowledge. I did the best I could to help her smile and know that I was right there behind her cheering her every word.
She took the stage. For 60 seconds, she was amazing … then … she faltered … and that was it for her. She left the stage and left the hall with as much dignity as she could muster. She was humiliated, defeated and beaten down by a game she should never have been asked to play.
My turn. I went up and did my two minutes on Client-Server architecture. The judges gave me a 9. Descending from the stage, I left the auditorium to see if I could find the Texan representative. I didn’t have to look far. She was sitting in the hall sobbing, her spirit crushed. Her manager soon arrived and tried to make light of the situation. Exploding into tears, she ran out of the building. I proceeded to read the riot act to this man who shrunk before my eyes as I vociferously expressed my indignation towards his character, or lack thereof.
My friends and I looked for her the next 2 days but she had apparently flown home. I heard through the grapevine that she quit a month later. She had been ‘the top rep’ in her area …
Dear managers,
If you plan on throwing someone who can’t swim into a pool, make sure it’s only a foot deep. If you need them to swim in the deep-end, then spend as much time as is needed swimming with that person in the deep-end, until they are comfortable doing so alone.
But remember this. Not everyone is a swimmer. Don’t ruin your high-jumpers by asking them to face their fear of water. If you need some swimmers, hire some.
I understand the ‘concept’ of personal growth by facing our fears. But, I also believe in the words balance, moderation and consideration. I never ask people to do things that they are uncomfortable with or unsuited for. Rather, I encourage and empower them to excel at the things that they are best suited for. This builds self-esteem and inner strength. Eventually, they might just dip their toes in the water on their own initiative.
You can’t build someone up by ripping them down.
Please … think about it. Speaking in public is not a game!
Cheers,
Gil
Photo Credit
Conference Hall – The Microsoft Office Clip Art Collection
Coffee with Julie says
OMG … what a nightmare experience! Verging on cruel, really. Like literally throwing people into the lions!
It never ceases to amaze me how “set up” the world is for extroverts (whether they do public speaking or not) over introverts — from the school system to the office.
Gil Namur says
A nightmare indeed Julie. I hope she went on to bigger and better things 🙂
Thanks for popping in!
Ian Shipclark says
Gil my friend, a very thought provoking a sensitively written article. I am one of those who for whatever reason giving presentations and public speaking in general came easy to me. By that I don’t mean that I’m any good at it, only that I’ve never been intimidated by it. But for me to take “credit” for finding public speaking to be not the terrifying experience many others find it would be every bit as ridiculous as taking “credit” for having blue eyes. The single best piece of advice I was given very early in my career regarding public speaking was to not waste energy trying to get rid of the butterflies, rather just to focus on getting them to fly in formation, and then use that energy. To deride or belittle someone for struggling with giving presentations or any other form of public speaking is again as ridiculous as berating them for the color of their eyes.
Gil Namur says
Hey Ian,
Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment 🙂
I agree with you amigo and I had a similar piece of advice. Alas, for so many, a mountain of tips wont help. The trick for a manager is to recognize that and not put people into a position where they can’t succeed. That said, for those who can, focusing energy is a very good thing!
Great to see you Saturday!
Cheers,
Gil
Dan L. Hays says
I agree Ian – not going to get rid of the butterflies! Just have to know they’ll be there and work with that. I’ve been public speaking for many years, and there are still the flutters! 🙂
Phil Arctander says
Good article Gil! And oh so true. Public speaking even in small crowds isn’t something that many people embrace For myself I constantly learn, even in small project meetings. Over the years I’ve learned another key component to public speaking in the way of reading audiences. Coming from a technical background it’s easy for me to speak in technical terms but the audience may not grasp the required fundamental knowledge.
I have to mention something that happened to me when I was in grade 7. I was nominated by a few of my peers to be on the student council. I recall there were around 3 candidates running for the position so an assembly was held. Each of us had 3 minutes to go on stage and speak about why we were the best candidate for the position. When my turn came I got onto the stage and grabbed the microphone and literally froze. The best I can remember is that I may have said a dozen words with many hums and ah’s. I never recovered from this while in grade school and of course avoided anything to do with student council.
Since then I’ve had many opportunities to speak publicly, everything from teaching to presentations. And I can honestly say I’ve learned to be very aware of my surroundings and maintain composure as I always remind myself of where I came from.
Phil Arctander
Gil Namur says
Hi Phil,
Thanks for your comment and insights.
You know, while a microphone was not involved, I had the same experience the first time I asked a girl out on a date and I didn’t even get to a dozen words …
“So … ummm … ermmm … ummm … so .. ummm .. HI!
Have a great Sunday Phil.
Cheers,
Gil
Richard I. Garber says
Gil:
Excellent article. Impromptu speaking is a completely different skill than speaking from a prepared sales script. It’s about like playing a jazz solo versus a classical piece you’ve rehearsed extensively with sheet music. I agree that the manager’s behavior was reprehensible.
Toastmasters International includes practice on impromptu one to two minute speeches in their meeting programs. They call that section Table Topics. It can be rough going for some even with lots of sales experience.
Richard
Gil Namur says
Hi Richard,
Thanks for your comment. Interesting analogy you make. I am a musician (jazz/rock) as well and do a lot of improvisation. You know, you have just given me the seeds for another article! I have met some amazing classically trained musicians who could not improvise at all. No sheet music, they are lost. I have met others who could improvise brilliantly. On the other end of the spectrum, I know some guitar players who have almost no knowledge of theory at all. No knowledge of scales, and yet, they can improvise and some of them are very good at it.
Thanks again! Will add this to my ‘must write about’ list!
Cheers,
Gil
Janice aka Janni says
Well said Gil, you were one of my favourite people to work with and for. Your understanding and compassion is as true in person as it is in written word. Miss u my friend and thanks for the times we worked together and had so much fun/success/laughter….
Janni
Gil Namur says
Janni!
THANK YOU for your very kind words!
I miss you too. Hope all is well in your world. You getting back out this way one of these days?
Gileeeeee
Mike DeWolfe says
I like to think that I’m good at public speaking, but I know I have to really work on it. When I do speak, I try to make eye contact with people in the front (I’m really near sighted, so the room could have 5 or 5,000– I’d never know) and then I try to speak to them for a bit, before moving to another person at the front. If I don’t make that human contact, I’ll just speed to get it over with. Speeding is my big problem. It’s as if I could get through a difficult hour long talk if I blurted my speech in 15 minutes. I know that doesn’t work, so I resist the urge and take my time.
When we do podcasts, it’s really easy because the pause button is at the ready.
I have heard some bad talks and at first I was really displeased that they were so bad and still insisted that their audience would bear up with it. I have a lot more sympathy now. I totally agree with your note and that people would not be thrust up to the stage. As Jerry Seinfeld noted: “The #1 fear is public speaking. The #2 is death. So the guy giving a eulogy at a funeral would like to trade places with the guy in the casket.”
Gil Namur says
Hi Mike,
Thanks for your comment! You touched on a few points that we’ll pick up on soon in a post offering some advice. Loved the Seinfeld reference LOL
Cheers,
Gil
Teresa (Sullivan) Harvey says
Gil,
A HUGE thank you for this very insightful and well written article from the hundreds of thousands of people out there who have had to suffer through ‘poorly presented presentations’ from individuals not skilled at public speaking.
I pity the poor people who had to sit through my early attempts at learning this skill.
This said, I feel blessed to have been surrounded by very skilled people who continue to take an interest in my professional development.
The advice I first received when faced with my absolute terror of public speaking was as follows:
“Sullivan…sometimes you just have to fake it until you make it!”. Can you imagine?!? That was the sum total of the training I received as we flew from Victoria to Vancouver to speak on a very contentious topic in front of 400 very angry people. I was so nervous – and therefore serious – people assumed I was a lawyer. Feel free to groan. I did.
I’ve come to learn that I do not feel comfortable behind a podium and relax when I have a microphone in my hand in an environment where I am able to walk around and engage my audience.
Now…if I can only get comfortable in front of a TV camera…all will be well in my world!
Any suggestions? It is a completely different fear!
Gil Namur says
Hi Teresa!
So glad to hear from you. What a lousy way to be coached … or perhaps … coaxed!
As to suggestions, yes … stay tuned! Another piece is coming soon with advice from several of our authors 😉
Gileeeeeeeee
janice says
Addendum to my previous thoughts: the poorly run biotech lab I worked for is now also defunct (recently) just like Digital. Coincidence? I think not. You can’t expect to be so completely inept and insensitive with your employees and still expect to have longterm high quality results.
Gil Namur says
janice says
I used to work at a crazy place where management went through a stage of trying to look “progressive” and “hip” by requiring people to speak in public (at large meetings). No mentoring or support was given just an ultimatum, “do it or your job is at risk”. I know it sounds nuts but they ended up sending some of their most dependable employees to the verge of nervous breakdowns. It really bothered me to see this! So I took it as an opportunity to speak up and be heard. When it came to me I think they came to see their error in encouraging open discussion and feedback about the company and found themselves wishing I would just shut up and tow the company line ……hahaha too late! 😀
Gil Namur says
Hey Janice,
Ada girl … well done! And thanks for dropping in with a comment 🙂
Cheers,
Gil
Robert Easterling says
Agreed wholeheartedly! There are reasons why personality defining questions get asked of employees in order to sort out their strong suits and attributes. Public speaking is certainly not for everyone and if you seriously need a public speaker for your company then you definitely want an individual who will best deliver your message to the audience you intend for them to speak to. It requires a high level of confidence in themselves and their knowledge of that particular topic. So if they do not posses either of these then you must either instill this confidence through mentoring or find yourself another speaker.
Gil Namur says
Thanks Robert!
Hope you have a great weekend!
Cheers,
Gil
Eric Brad says
As a positive dog trainer who uses a “Mark and Reward” system to encourage behaviours as I train, I’m sometimes asked what the opposite of my kind of training is. The best definition I’ve been able to come up with is “Test and Punish” training where you test the subjects knowledge and punish them for non performance until they get it right.
You have just illustrated “Test and Punish” training perfectly. Apparently if it’s good enough for humans, it’s good enough for dogs too.
Bravo for standing up for proper, humane treatment!
Gil Namur says
Hey Eric!
Thanks! You know, I thought of you while writing this because of the many chats we have had on the subject of dog training.
As you know … I agree!
Cheers,
Gil
Dan L. Hays says
Outstanding, Gil! I can’t believe the structure of these “games” in the first place. Maybe the first person to have been tried them out was the guy who thought them up. That might have changed things. I feel for the poor woman who was put in such a harsh position, and I love your note to managers!
No, speaking in public is not a game, and not everyone is suited for it!
Dan
Gil Namur says
Thanks Dan!
Appreciate your feedback and support 🙂
Cheers,
Gil