I want to live in a world where people are supported for the gifts they already give to the world, regardless of whether those gifts are “money making” or not. I would love a world where just being and doing what you can is enough to be considered worthy.
A Balanced View
If you focus too much on the other person’s flaws, you miss everything you are adding to the equation. Furthermore, you miss all the other person’s positives, perhaps to the point where you reject someone who could be a great partner for you.
We Love “Our” Stuff Too Much
People can, and often are, attached to objects that have zero monetary value. The three sentence letter my grandfather wrote me about his pocket watch a few years before he died wouldn’t get me a single slice of bread in a trade.
Alzheimer’s Self
Moments like that made me question the entire narrative I had about the past. And memory. And time. I have had a few similar experiences during meditation, but for some reason, the shifting in the flesh and blood of my grandfather seemed more startling.
Lessons From the Diving Board
As I began to move through the air, the teacher yanked the pole away, and a sudden racing feeling shot through my body. It was too late to go back, and yet the fear ruined my form, and I ended up smacking the surface of the water with my back
The Dating Industrial Complex
While part of me is grateful that options have expanded through methods like online dating, I’m unable to ignore the rest of the baggage that has come with those expanded options. The shopping mentality many folks have. The short attention spans. The transactional expectations. It’s difficult to ignore how pervasive this stuff is.
We Are the Seasons
This time of year, when winter is disappearing and spring is stepping forth, often feels unstable. One hour, you’re slipping on half melted dirty ice and getting honked at by some woman in a grungy car, and the next you’re marvelling at the beauty of the first opened flower, the miracle of breathing, just being alive together.
Butterflies in Winter
Amongst her repeated subjects is the butterfly. Sitting under a pile of snow and cold darkness here in Minnesota, butterflies seem far away. Their fragile beauty, strong determination (able to fly thousands of miles), and utterly obvious impermanence (most living less than a year) make them great subjects for Buddhist poetry. Here are four of Chiyo-ni’s butterfly haiku. May they inspire dreams, especially for those of us living in the winter darkness right now.
The Person Who is Not Busy
Yuan Mei, like many of the great Chinese poets, exhibited many talents: working as a government official, teacher, writer, and a painter. Perhaps meditation and the teachings of Zen (Ch’an in Chinese) helped him pace himself. Maintain some sort of balance and equanimity.
But when you consider his poem, perhaps his life was overly busy like so many of us today. The longing for simplicity. For a tranquil place. The focus on nature.
The Suppression of Male Tears
I was 13 years old. As one of the pallbearers, I stood at the end of the line, watching the casket sliding from the hearse. Suddenly, I felt weak. Grief rushed through me in a way I hadn’t known before. I turned away, just at the time when I should have been reaching up. My uncle turned and screamed something nasty at me. What exactly, I don’t remember. Only that “do your job” was tagged to the end of it. I didn’t forgive him for years for that, even though it was mostly a reaction out of fear that the casket would fall.
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