I
find I get easily discouraged these days. I can go for long periods of time not feeling like doing the things I know I should be doing (exercising, house cleaning, you name it). As a result, I find myself doing the things I know I shouldn’t – drinking more, eating late at night, leading a secluded life. I know this isn’t the worst behavior in the world, just ask my cats. They actually love it when I’m home – singing after I’ve had a nip or two, eating a bowl of cereal with extra milk, not to mention all the extra snuggling and play time they get. They prefer ‘fun Mommy’. But as with all slippery slopes, there’s a point when you know you need to make a change and get back to routine. Sometimes that’s easier said than done.
That’s where the small successes come in. I’ve discovered they’re crucial in my ability to feel accomplished and good about myself – they help get me back on track. Not only that, a lot of the time, I feel as though it’s completely within my power to make them happen. These are radically different than big successes, and important to someone who, like me, may feel at a particular point in their life like there are no big successes. I came across a saying a while back:
’Confidence Is The Memory Of Past Success’
I like this saying. But depending on where you are in your life, it can either be reaffirming or a sad realization. For me at times, it seemed to be the latter. When I looked back on my life, I couldn’t see any big successes, which explained the lack of confidence. This is why the small successes are so important. They build you up, little by little.
Like today, when I’m out for a walk on one of my favorite trails. I usually walk the entire route, but jog up ‘the hill’ as a challenge. Because I’d had a particularly busy past few weeks and felt like I hadn’t contributed to the world or that I’d bettered myself in any way, I decided to do the route twice – once walking, the second time jogging. I’d never done that before, so I had no idea what the success rate would be. A couple of things happened – first, I made a decision to do something different. Instead of stopping and walking whenever I came across people on the trail (which I would normally do because I’m not a jogger and feel self-conscious when people are around) I jogged right past them, thinking they had nothing to do with my goal and therefore should not get in the way of it! A small success. The second thing that happened is that as I approached ‘the hill’, I was ready with my inner dialogue. Instead of justifying why it would be okay to stop and walk, I coached myself with self-talk every step of the way – before I knew it I was at the top of the hill. Another small success. I left the trail feeling 10 feet tall.
I still look forward to the big successes – but as I write this, I wonder if I might be experiencing them now. How could things so seemingly insignificant make me feel so good? Maybe they’re not so small after all?
Photo Credits
Photos by Carol Good – all rights reserved
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