There were a series of other miracles that now lie behind me, and here are a few of them.
We married in June, 1980. I was so happy and excited. At 29, I had finally found him. I designed my wedding gown and selected my favourite flower for my bouquet: gardenia. It would be the happiest day of my life, or so I thought.
He had wined and dined me and took me to splendid parts of the country to enjoy nature’s bounty. He was a teacher; certainly the perfect profession for a stepfather, and his students clearly loved him. We read books together, laughed and talked for untold hours about everything. How perfect.
All of that changed on the honeymoon. I won’t go into details but suffice it to say he suddenly became a stranger; quiet, moody, isolated and was not about to touch me in any room let alone the bedroom. Six weeks after we were married, I found out quite by accident he already had a girlfriend. It was downhill from there.
The company he worked for moved us to Texas then Illinois, Ohio, and Pennsylvania. All the while I was trying to be the wife he wanted. I planned candle light dinners, secret and sexy surprises, evenings alone and so on, all to no avail. Our ‘conversations’ always ended up in his favour and confused me to near a breaking point. He became a pot-smoking, OCD salesman who could talk an Eskimo into a deep freeze. The company loved him, while I began to think I was losing my mind.
One day he told me to get ready; we were going out. He silently drove us four hours to Chicago and the Baha’i Temple in Wilmette.
It was early March, cold, almost dark and stormy with a light dusting of snow on the ground. I stepped out of the car in utter astonishment that he would be so kind to even think of bringing me to this special place. Dennis was proudly an atheist. We entered the building and found an elderly woman with perfect white hair welcoming people at the door with a hug. I waited for my turn.
We entered the giant rotunda, a huge inner room with rows and rows of chairs. There are no podiums or pulpits for preaching in the Baha’i faith. My gaze went around the room as I noticed the nine archways, one in honour of each of the major religions of the world. Dennis left me to my devices and began walking around the perimeter, one shoe squeaking upon each step. I selected a lone chair in the middle and sat down. I glanced up to the dome above me.
The intricate pattern allowed in but a smattering of light and yet it was the crowning glory. Could it be that the Universe was peeking in at me? A wave of emotion crested in my chest and my eyes filled up. Suddenly I felt the safety and the presence of an Energy much bigger than little old me. My eyes closed to push the tears cascading down my cheeks.
I prayed and offered my gratefulness at just being there.
I don’t know how long I sat there, maybe 30 minutes or so. When I finally opened my eyes, I looked down at my hands lying one upon the other in my lap. I gasped. There, bathing my hands in warmth was a single beam of sunlight. I looked up. It was the only beam of sunlight that penetrated the latticed dome and it was falling directly upon my hands. More tears; more gratefulness.
I sat a while longer in the peace then I met up with my husband. As we were leaving, I waited in line once more for the hug. My husband tapped me on the shoulder as I wished in silent repose that he’d take his squeaky shoe and his intruding attention and leave me to my peace. He tapped again, and again, and then he whispered my name.
I turned and said, “What?” He merely pointed at something. I glanced in the direction of his insistence. There, in all its glory, was a giant gardenia bush with one single flower blooming directly in the center. More tears. I choked on the air. My eyes overflowed again and it was all I could do to hold myself up.
I heard Divine Messages that day and I knew I’d be alright. I knew there was strength and determination within me and I knew I didn’t need to be somewhere where I wasn’t wanted or loved. My husband had driven me to the Truth.
After two and a half years of a one-sided marriage, I left. When I told him I was going home a few weeks later, he merely said, “Say hi to the folks.” I knew he really didn’t get it that I was leaving him for good.
I count my visit to the Temple as one of my miracles to this day; the choice of chairs out of hundreds, the beam of sunlight, the single blossom on a snowy March day. It had been a day of gentle sweetness and a reminder that even when I felt so alone, I was connected to the Life Force…call it what you may.
…to be continued
Photo Credits
Wedding photo – By Faye Thornton – All Rights Reserved
All other photos @ 123rf Stock Photos
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