“Patience is a virtue.” Unfortunately it’s not a virtue I possess. I want everything to be happening now. Time is ticking away so bring on the “good” stuff. Every minute, every hour counts! My father recently turned 80 and I hope he has many more birthdays to come. I sometimes wish I knew when my innings were going to be up. I would then adjust my life accordingly. If I was going to cark it in a month’s time, I would quit my job and fly my sons to Europe for our holiday of a lifetime. I would arrive back home the day before the day of reckoning and I would plan my own funeral. “Another One Bites The Dust” by Queen would play and I would tell everyone not to bring flowers but instead to plant a tree. If I was going to live into my 80s, I would be less anxious and more relaxed about the life ahead of me. I wouldn’t feel the need to pack so much into a short time. I could stop being a time management freak. Life could be breezy perhaps.
If we all knew our use by date, would we behave differently? If we could get credits for good behaviour and good diet would McDonald’s go out of business and would prisons be empty? I look back and think that if I knew how my story was going to turn out so far I would have rewritten some chapters. This begs the question: is our story pre-written? Do we have much control over our destiny? Would we still end up at the same destination regardless of the choices we make? Is everything fate? Is every day just a piece in a jigsaw puzzle?
Some friends and relationships are long term while others come and go. I tend towards rationalising such entrances and departures. “I met them for a reason,” I tell myself. Was the friendship meant to be short or did I just stuff it up somehow? What I thought was going to be a new chapter in my life ended up being a short story. My mind often plays out conversations and events prior to them happening but they never play out how I have scripted. Do other people do this or is this the curse of the few? People often spruik the mantra that you must visualise what you want but this technique has never worked for me and my expectations are rarely met. Something has to be said for the “living in the moment” philosophy, though I wonder how many people are truly successful at doing that.
Then I think about my enduring friends and contemplate why they’ve stuck by me. I am not the easiest of people to have in one’s life. Thank goodness patience is one of their virtues!
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