Recently, I ventured
to a local gas station and waited in line while the cashier in the booth waited on a customer. Her name tag read “Joice”. The elderly man in front of me said, “You should add an ‘RE’ before your name.” The cashier glared at him and he walked away. I approached the cashier and said “Good morning!” She hastily replied, “What do you need?” I could sense that she was in a bad mood and was definitely not a “REjoice” today.
I began to recount this episode over the next few days and I pondered that names can reflect your identity. It brands you. Do parents really know the significance of the names that they bestow on their children? Do parents even realize that nicknames and pet names have an effect on a child?
For example: Put the nickname “Cookie” on a daughter. Does this means she’s sweet, or could this be a dog’s name? Or naming your daughter “Ebony”? Does that mean she is Black or African American? What about naming your son “Barack?”
I had a nickname when I was younger, and my brothers and sisters still refer to me sometimes as “Boo-bee.” Now, you’re laughing and asking yourself how did I get that name? Well, my father was in the US Army and we were traveling as a family to his next duty assignment in Stuttgart, Germany via an airplane. I was around seven years old and for some reason the flight upset my innards and I began to experience diarrhea. I was frightened to go to the restroom so I just sat in my stool. The plane began to reek of a terrible odour and it was soon found out that it was me. Hence the name “Boo-bee.”
I was chided by my brothers and sisters and never allowed to forget that incident. Now when they call me that, I instantly get defensive. Couldn’t they just call me my real name…Phyllis? But, you see, I don’t even like my real name!
I have asked myself (and my Mother) why someone would name their child “Phyllis?” As you can imagine during elementary school I was called Phyllis Diller, Philly, Phil, you name it, and I was usually called some derivative of “Phyllis.” When I asked my mother why she named me Phyllis, she said “Your brother before you was named Phillip.”
Okay, so she was trying to match names…is that a good reason? I venture to say that other parents have done likewise, especially when you have twins or multiple births…Jason and Jack, Mary and Maryann, etc…
But I could envision myself being called Angela or Cynthia…something refined. Or what about Sandra? Oh no, that’s my sister’s name! Well, anyone please just pick a name for me as long as it’s not “Phyllis.”
I recently asked my boyfriend what would he see my name being and he said “Phyllis!” Okay, so he’s no help. But seriously, a name sticks with you and it’s important to consider a child’s name when naming them, as you convey a meaning with most names. Names are very powerful.
Do you want to name a child to differentiate them from others? To make them unique? What about the nickname you use for your nephew; does it “work” for him?
There is a name for everyone — if you pick the right name.
Photo Credits
“Baby” from The Daily Mail
Feature Pic @ Brian Pennington
Recent Phyllis Wilson Articles:
- Dear Wayne
- What Is Your Greatest Strength?
- The Purpose of Life is a Life of Purpose
- Have You Checked In With The Person In The Mirror Lately?
- Soul Food
This really struck a chord with me. Last year at about this time, we were trying to come up with baby names. Our now 8 month old boy has what I consider a lovely and original name, but it took a long time to get there.
At one point, I was stuck on the first name Bella if we were to have a girl. Obviously I have not crawled out from the rock I am under when it comes to pop culture, because a friend of mine had to point out that Bella is the name of the main charachter in Twilight.
Can you imagine how many Bellas there would have been in my would-be little girl’s first grade class? Yipes!
I have to agree it took me quite a while to get used to my name. It didn’t help that at home my five siblings called me Bunny (something about carrots, hopping and as I aged very big front teeth). Naturally the neighbourhood accepted the nickname and sometimes were confounded to learn that my name was actually Madelaine.
As my mother was French Canadian, I was constantly being told the spelling was English when in fact it was my mother trying to give me some special quality. I have spent some time justifying the spelling ‘aine’ instead of ‘eine’ as French, to no avail. I was the only one with MY name through grade school and high school. Few, knew me as Bunny. So as the years pass I have developed several monikers – Madelaine, Bunny, Mado (for the french side of the family), Maddie for the college and University friends who felt the need to shorten and now tante ‘do. Tante instead of aunt is from my nephews who were taught “tante Mado”. Naturally at their young age what came out was ‘do and there you have it.
Unfortunately an elder cousin caught wind of it and last I heard I am ‘tanto’…. ugh!
now that brought a smile to my face! 🙂
For some unknown reason Ive’ always believed that whatever name given to each of us by our parents is the perfect name designed specifically for us,no matter if it is Barack or Abraham the moment you are named thats who you look like and that name just fits.I must say that some parents my take naming their children to extreme levels, but what ever name given seems to grow on you;so for those of you who my wish you had a different name forget about it;thats who you look like!!!!!!!!! Phyllis.
Thanks Gerald!
My older (by 7.5 years) daughter’s nickname for my younger daughter was “Icky” said with equal parts jealous sibling rivalry and affection. Luckily for daughter #2, the moniker didn’t stick. It just didn’t sound right when *other* people said it …
Tori,
Do tell…how did she get the name Icky?
Phyllis Wilson
I don’t think she even really remembers … I think it was just a “Ew this new baby is icky in a cute sort of way” 7-year-old thing…
Oh how I empathize with you Phyllis. However , I do rather like your name.
There were no less than eight (8) pupils in my class at school named Joan.
I suppose the actors /actresses of the moment are the ‘in’ names for the upcoming
unsuspecting babies.
Four (4) years of a class with eight (8) Joans , with teachers calling out to a pupil, and one does not have to wonder why I do not favor my first name.
Well lets say it is one of the reasons. 🙂
I am pretty sure the different teachers were as confused as we were, even with the first letter of our family names following our first, it was kind of confusing to say the least. Funny at times too.
Joan,
That’s crazy 8 of you in class…now I could see 8 Phyllis’ 🙂
Oh me tooooo Phyllis, me too, but only one, right? 🙂
It took me forty years to accept my name, mostly because no one in this country could pronounce it. Now I love it for that very fact, that it distinguishes me from everyone else, it gives me wicked pleasure when people struggle to say it right and it affords me lots of great nicknames. The fact that it refers to illumination is a plus too. Makes me feel all bright and shiny. 🙂
Chiarina,
I love it! “WICKED PLEASURE”
Phyllis