I’ve always loved the profound wisdom of “the golden rule,” which admonishes us to simply treat others as we would like to be treated.
Yet as a relationship blogger, it is astounding to me how often we violate this timeless rule in our most personal of relationships.
In fact, many couples interact with each other more like adversaries than committed lovers. Spouses harshly berate each other privately and in public. Arguments frequently devolve into hateful recriminations and vulgar name-calling. Sex is primarily used as a means of manipulation, and the withholding of it as retaliation.
Of course, traditional resources such as marriage therapy and couples counseling exist to help heal ailing relationships. There are also numerous books, blogs, online courses, and videos which provide more advice to help couples desperate to save their unions.
While all of these tools can help couples improve their relationships, the conscious practice of the golden rule is one of the most powerful, although woefully overlooked, foundational strategies.
Consider if we keep the wisdom of the golden rule at the forefront of our minds when engaging our mates. Exactly kind of impact would it have?
What if we imagined how devastated we would be if our spouses had an extra-marital affair – before embarking on one ourselves? How would we feel if our past mistakes were constantly being resurrected? Might this encourage us to be more forgiving? What if we truly pondered how it would feel not to be appreciated? Would this prevent us from taking our partners for granted?
The power of the golden rule is, it compels us to become more accountable for our behaviors by reflecting them back to us. It is also a reminder that the universe returns to us in kind whatever we release into it.
Is it really that simple? Can consciously practicing the golden rule in your relationship make a difference? Yes it can, but remember just because a thing is simple does not necessarily mean it is easy.
Is it worth the effort? Absolutely! Our relationships are the most valuable assets we have. Which makes it all the more vital we cherish, strengthen and nurture them. The ageless wisdom of the golden rule can help us do just that – if we dare.
Photo Credit
Photo is © Fred Goldstein – Dreamstime.com
Guest Author Bio
Terez Williamson
Terez Williamson is an author and blogger who writes about the challenges of dating and creating vibrant relationships in the 21st century. You can find more of Terez’s musings on his blog, RegainYourRelationship.com.
Blog / Website: http://www.RegainYourRelationship.com
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You write as if following the Golden Rule is a choice and while it can be, its been my experience that there are those who routinely do, as a part of who they are and those who routinely don’t for the same reason. Call them type A’s or B’s if you like but one type can’t, in good conscience, do things to others that they don’t like being done to them. Doing so lowers their self-esteem. The other type enhances their self-esteem through personal achievement and only follow the Golden Rule when it suits their purpose. While they feel the same as everyone ( or even stronger ) about the way they want to be treated, in general they lack the empathy necessary to associate those feelings with their treatment of others and develop the ability to rationalize their behavior and blame others for the effect. Unfortunately opposites do tend to attract ( co-dependency ) and so many relationships contain one of each type; one who creates most of the conflict and one who endures it for as long as they are able. The truth is that one person in a relationship following the Golden Rule is not enough.