Today let’s talk about overreacting.
Have you ever been told you overreact to things?
I heard that a lot, because things that happened in my world all seemed out of proportion or scarier than they actually were. I was still reacting to life like I did as a child, where every interaction might lead to a chaotic confrontation. If I was listening to an innocent discussion between two people, and there was a disagreement, in my mind the next thing that would happen was an escalation to violence. That wasn’t actually happening, but I overreacted, and would hyperventilate and get into fight or flight mode to protect myself. I had to learn to separate today’s events from the past, which takes a lot of hard work. But now I’m not making such a big deal out of people disagreeing. What a freedom!
Have you ever experienced overreacting to events?
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Dan L. Hays offers encouragement for adult children of alcoholics.
The podcasts of these episodes can be found at: Minute to Freedom
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Dan
It’s great to see your work
As one of your fans, I appreciate your skill with words
Overreact?? Never! Especially not during stressful times
Best to you in 2013
🙂
Hey Leslie! Great to have you stop by over here! So glad to hear how you appreciate my work, and thanks for honoring my skill with words.
LOL – yeah, I started not to include this piece, because I figured no one would relate to overreacting. ‘Cause everyone is cool and placid during stressful times! 🙂
Hope you have a wonderful 2013!
Hi Dan,
Indeed I have both as an observer and as the over-reactor.
For me, the dynamics are totally different than yours as my past is very different. It has to do with fear … which in this case is that famous acronym for ‘Fictional Events Appearing Real’. I used to imagine ‘bad outcomes’ to certain events in my life and then I would act out by either getting very angry at some poor inanimate object ( it can feel very good to throw things and watch them break … well … then it feels very embarrassing!) or get very stressed out, sometimes to the point of anxiety. The older I got, the more I realized that the FEAR acronym is soooooooo true and I have managed to train myself to not go down those rabbit holes. A deep breath and clarity of thinking is a wonderful tool!
I have also watched others do the same thing. Totally overreact to something innocent. Many of these folks had very low self esteem and were re-acting from a place of fear of failure, or being rejected, or not being heard. Through this, I have found it interesting that low self esteem can often manifest itself as a rather large ego!
Cheers,
Gil
Gil – interesting that the dynamic is very different, but the outcome much the same. Yup, I’ve utilized the FEAR acronym in my life as well. Broke a few inanimate objects. I realized much later that a lot of exercise kept that energy muted much more than if I hadn’t had an outlet.
Yup, seen many people overreact to something innocuous that didn’t appear to be the real issue. There’s a saying in the ACA readings “adult children of alcoholics compensate for a low sense of self esteem by trying to appear superior.” Yes, the low self esteem showing up as a large ego – applied to me a LOT! I tried to be the most knowledgeable Bible scholar or whatever seemed to give me some worth.
Great chat Gil! 🙂