I figured it was safer in the open. Dopers have an amazing calculus when they’re out of dope, when the sickness is on them, knowing that they need something now. I always believed the romance that junkies were fallen angels, had danced the Nutcracker, were just down on their luck, a day or two away from getting their “shit” together. Mostly though, they stole my wallet and my drugs and then they helped me look for them.
I made a decision earlier this year to evolve. I don’t think we are, at our core, capable of really changing. We are who we are. But we can evolve — move forward. Add to our lives and walk away from negative habits, decisions, people — anything…I decided to tackle my list one thing at a time. Running was a close second to giving my marriage a second chance.
I am looking for rocks of cocaine. I’m broke and getting broker, and all I want to do is get high. There is Jack telling me some fairy tale and watching me do this, just like two regular guys on a Saturday afternoon, just folks, sittin’ on the stoop, looking out at the neighborhood, talking football or jazz.
A woman helps her brother to deal with his addiction, then begins to change her own life.
On a Mother’s Day, a man in the grip of addiction, encounters a Reiki healer, a healing tree, and the grief he thought he had detoured around when he lost his Mom 13 years earlier.
“I woke up this morning in the arms of a nightmare. It got better after that.” Michael Lebowitz explores the darkness and faith is this moving vignette.