The thing about tunnels is they are usually dark and somewhat scary places. Our fears scurry in tunnels, avoiding the light of open spaces; our doubts whisper to us from tunnel walls. But tunnels are often the quickest way, sometimes the only way, to get from where we are to our next destination on the journey.
I have been through many tunnels.
The tunnels of our lives are those frightening stretches of the path that we must traverse to continue to our destination. They often represent a lesson or a fear or a challenge that we must get through in order to continue our growth. Sometimes tunnels represent those disorienting stretches of the journey between here and there. No longer here, but not quite there. Those dark spaces between phases, where what we did before no longer works, yet we have not yet acquired the knowledge or skills for what lies ahead. We are awkward in the tunnels of our lives, blindly fumbling to grasp and articulate that which we do not yet understand.
I have been known to stand quaking at a tunnel entrance, peering in fearfully, immobile for days or weeks or years. I know I must enter or I will remain stalled, unable to reach the next phase of my life. So eventually I have stepped tentatively in, swiping at unseen forces, avoiding the temptation to return to the safety of the light I can still see behind me. And then that light disappears. And I drop to my knees, crying and crawling through some areas, groping and grasping. My mind tells me to go back, that I will die in this darkness, that I am not strong enough to make it through. Or it tells me to shut down, to roll myself into a protective ball, knees to chest, and wait to be rescued. But something stronger than my mind keeps me moving forward; sometimes sobbing and raging, but slowly advancing until I see a dim light ahead. And each time I do this that light feels like salvation.
At this point in my journey, I know by experience that I can survive the tunnels of my life. That when I emerge from the other end, I will have grown wiser and stronger, and more fully who I am. That I am then able to meet the challenges and embrace the opportunities in the next phase of my life. And I have learned that being “saved” is a not one-time event, but that at the end of each tunnel, at every inch of growth, at each victory, at each movement along this journey — Salvation.
Image Credit:
Park Pathway Through a Tunnel – Microsoft Clip Art
First Posted At Journey of a Grown up Black Woman
Hi Susan,
Going through transitions, or the tunnels you’ve compared them to, are always difficult. We cannot step into them without dredging up our fears of the unknown — even when the transitions are welcomed or sought after — like a new job, new home, or new love. Experience my tell us that we will survive the transition, but that doesn’t seem to lessen our anxiety the next time we face one.