I am very impressionable. Seriously. My subconscious is a sponge. A super porous, extra absorbent sponge. If my brain were toilet paper, it would be Charmin Ultra. Actually, that’s a good analogy, considering the amount of crap my brain soaks up.
When I expose myself to a certain kind of media for extended periods of time, I start to think in that form. For example, if I read graphic novels I see my life in panels of images, and everyone has thought bubbles over their heads.
Novels will have me narrating my every action in the protagonist’s voice: She walked down the stairs, contemplating the day ahead. Now that she had the magic talisman in her possession, her travels were bound to get more…interesting. But first! — her morning coffee and toast.
And you probably don’t want to be around me when I’m reading Dostoevsky. One hundred pages into Crime and Punishment and suddenly I’m sulking about town, glaring at everyone and muttering like a crazy person, a disturbing inner monologue running through my head.
My sister is like this too. I remember a few years ago she told me she’d been feeling depressed. Sad, melancholic, nostalgic for something…but she didn’t know what. She felt lost. Being the loving sister that I am, I banned her from listening to the Lord of the Rings soundtracks (which she played pretty much constantly). A few days later I asked how she felt.
Fantastic! she said. And less like I just got separated from the only eight people in the world I can trust!
Funny, that.
So, I’ve been listening to a lot of podcasts lately. Mostly the previously mentioned and wondrously funny Hamish & Andy show. If you haven’t checked it out yet, Hamish and Andy are two young Australian fellas who just sit around and be silly. Totally my kind of guys!
Should I be surprised, then, when I noticed that my internal monologue has shifted so that I’m constantly being interviewed? By two guys who joke around a lot? No, no, I shouldn’t.
I should, however, be slightly concerned that in this internal narration I have an Australian accent. And everything I do is so fabulous and interesting — I’m on all the time. It’s like a reality show for the radio.
Hamish: So, Sarah, tell us what you did today!
Andy: Yes, we can’t wait to hear the details.
Me: Well, I went to the gym…
Andy: No, you didn’t! NO, YOU DIDN’T!
Me: Yes, and I ate some sushi…
Hamish: STOP! STOP! I can’t BREATHE!
Voice Over: P-P-P-PLATINUM SARAH!
I’m not alone in this. Right? Other people narrate their lives?
Right?
Photo Credits
How to prepare the skull for surgery, brain exposed, c. 16th century © Brain Blogger – Flickr
Feature Photo, Optimal Brain Function, by Tonystl
Vincent Ross says
Hi Sarah,
Great introspective personality piece. It also intrigues me that you should be hooked on Hamish and Andy, who happen to broadcast from SAFM here in Adelaide, South Australia.
How did you first come to hear them?
They are very popular here in Australia too, I think not because they are any great wits as comedians, but because they basically carry on like two teenagers, daring each other to do things and taking the audience along for the ride.
I suppose the best description for them in the Australian vernacular would be “lovable larrikins”.
Interestingly, I think there is a certain psychological synchronicity between Canadians and Australians. Maybe it’s the Colonial link.
Suffice to say, not sure many other nationalities would appreciate their humour.
Cheers,
Vince Ross
mary says
You are not alone! As a writer/artist, I can totally relate.. I’ve been narrating in my head…since I was about 11 years old!! I was also getting interviewed on great talk shows like oprah.. as you see, it has yet to happen.. Oprah.. if you’re reading this… ahem. And since having my daughter, I’m totally seeing myself being shot as a reality show!
Anyway.. if we don’t think ourselves as news/interview worthy, who will? haa haa!!!
BTW, I LOVE your stuff, you totally crack me up!
Sarah Gignac says
Thanks Mary! I do the personal reality show sometimes too…
michelle says
have you read The Origin of Species by Nino Ricci? I didn’t like it as much as the hype would have suggested, but it’s worth it just for the protagonist’s inner monologues, which consist of him being imaginarily interviewed about events in his life by Peter Gzowski. Classic Canadiana!
Sarah Gignac says
Thanks for the suggestion, I’ll look for it! Though, if I start fashioning my inner monologues like a fictional character whose constantly doing his own weird inner monologues, will I cause a paradox and implode the world?
Julia Childish says
I got quite a rise out of your article, Sarah. Although the idea that people think in the genre that they are immersed in is a little half baked. Anyone with 2 teaspoons of common sense would see that as a recipe for disaster. Give your head a shake and bake.
Sarah Gignac says
I had to read that out loud to get it 🙂 Nice one!
Angie says
You’ve got to fight!
For the right!
To listen to Sarah on the radio!
P-P-P-Platinum Sarah made me laugh so hard tea came out my nose!
Mom says
… as usual she read with relish her daughter’s latest piece …. and lightening struck …. the last 29 years of her daughter’s life flashed forward in an instant …. and suddenly it all made sense … she understood … thank you Sarah for inviting us in your mind … thanks for the laugh … Love you!
coffeewithjulie says
Love this! thanks Sarah! I’m literally laughing out loud!