I’ve always loved the profound wisdom of “the golden rule,” which admonishes us to simply treat others as we would like to be treated.

Yet as a relationship blogger, it is astounding to me how often we violate this timeless rule in our most personal of relationships.

In fact, many couples interact with each other more like adversaries than committed lovers. Spouses harshly berate each other privately and in public. Arguments frequently devolve into hateful recriminations and vulgar name-calling. Sex is primarily used as a means of manipulation, and the withholding of it as retaliation.

Of course, traditional resources such as marriage therapy and couples counseling exist to help heal ailing relationships. There are also numerous books, blogs, online courses, and videos which provide more advice to help couples desperate to save their unions.

While all of these tools can help couples improve their relationships, the conscious practice of the golden rule is one of the most powerful, although woefully overlooked, foundational strategies.

Consider if we keep the wisdom of the golden rule at the forefront of our minds when engaging our mates. Exactly kind of impact would it have?

What if we imagined how devastated we would be if our spouses had an extra-marital affair – before embarking on one ourselves? How would we feel if our past mistakes were constantly being resurrected? Might this encourage us to be more forgiving? What if we truly pondered how it would feel not to be appreciated? Would this prevent us from taking our partners for granted?

The power of the golden rule is, it compels us to become more accountable for our behaviors by reflecting them back to us. It is also a reminder that the universe returns to us in kind whatever we release into it.

Is it really that simple? Can consciously practicing the golden rule in your relationship make a difference? Yes it can, but remember just because a thing is simple does not necessarily mean it is easy.

Is it worth the effort? Absolutely! Our relationships are the most valuable assets we have. Which makes it all the more vital we cherish, strengthen and nurture them. The ageless wisdom of the golden rule can help us do just that – if we dare.

Photo Credit

Photo is © Fred Goldstein – Dreamstime.com

Guest Author Bio

Terez Williamson
Terez Williamson is an author and blogger who writes about the challenges of dating and creating vibrant relationships in the 21st century. You can find more of Terez’s musings on his blog, RegainYourRelationship.com.

Blog / Website: http://www.RegainYourRelationship.com

Follow Terez: Facebook | Twitter

Relationships And The Golden Rule is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

You are not like every cliché repeated often till meaning dies

You are like brilliant truth, revealing my weakness for your body

You are not like a rose whose fragrance and guarded beauty is oft repeated

You are like the smell of a thousand pines calling and seducing me to lay in your arms

You are not like an angel whose wings carried you to me from afar

Your are like mischievous devils whose temptations take me from fantasy to reality

You are not like a song, a tune sung over and over, children clapping their hands

You are like the sounds of waves, crashing your sexuality over my beaches

You are not like gentle swans, perfect beauty so many times compared

You are like violent lightning, striking the lies of men and melting my soul to yours

You not like the ordinary and common seen on every poet’s page

You are like the grandeur of space, possessing the beginning and ending of my life

Photo Credits

 The Microsoft Office Clip Art Collection

First written in opinionsofeye.com

Guest Author Bio

Drew Sager
Words. Deep thoughts. Eccentric. Madness. Lover. Dark. Music. Melancholic. Beaches. Guitars. Addict. Primal. Curious.

I’m an apologist and an apostate. I’ve been knocked down, way down, and fought my way back up, way up. I’ve been an advocate of peace and a destroyer of the same, in a word, I am dichotomy. A battle of polar opposites.

Blog / Website: http://www.opinionsofeye.com/

You Are Not is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

Thinking about when it first occurred to me to look inward, I realize it was about 15 years ago. I was 30. I went to my brother for some kind of guidance. He sent me a book called Living Zen, by Charlotte “Joko” Beck. This was just a few months after the birth of my first child, during the marriage to my first husband. The book made my hair hurt, but I stayed with it because my brother gave it to me. I wanted to get it.

Beck was hard. I got stuck—a lot. I had to call my brother and ask him what the fuck was she talking about. Sometimes he said, “I don’t know” which really confused me, yet at the same time, filled me with curiosity. I read certain passages over and over again. Some stuff clicked, but what I vividly recall about that book is that she kept hammering home the idea that “practice” was really, really hard. I don’t remember that she defined the term. I just remember feeling worse after finishing the book, yet somehow better at the same time. There was something out there, but it would be a lot of work getting to it. I felt like I knew that to be true—I mean the former—that there was definitely something more to achieve than believing the nonsense that was occupying my life at the time. What it came down to was this: enough of what Beck said made enough sense to me that I kept thinking about her, the ideas she suggested.

Then, I got very busy for several years being so far out of the moment, I was in it, and very unhappy. But I didn’t forget. Sometimes I wonder if Beck made it harder for me to put up with the nonsense. Obviously, she didn’t do any of this. I had signaled the universe that I was hungry to make sense of life, especially my life.

When I got my bearings and the dust of my divorce settled, I started exploring some of the residual feelings left over from that initial experience with Eastern ways of looking at life that I had been exposed to five or so years before. I kept reading, eventually finding authors at the shallow end of the Zen meditation, Eastern philosophy pool. Not that the writing was shallow, just personally more accessible.

Fast forward to my current life. Second husband. Two stepchildren. Ten thousand more stressors, yet I’m awash in the warmth of love, even those days when I want to strangle every third person who crosses my path. Being settled into a life that I embrace, not just endure, has opened the door a bit more. It’s called truth. Turns out, Gloria Steinem was correct: “The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.”

My therapist gave me a copy of a Metta meditation the other day. I could apply it specifically toward those in my life who trigger deep-seated anxieties, she said. I read it, and liked it, but then, while trying to find it on the Internet so that I could print a cleaner copy, I ran across a different version, one containing a keyword, derived from a specific feeling that seems to appear as if on cue at certain moments in my life: annoyed. Make that, super annoyed.

FROM THE ANGUTTARA NIKAYA, 5:161
(SPOKEN BY THE BUDDHA)

Bhikkhus, there are these five ways of removing annoyance, by which annoyance can be entirely removed by a bhikkhu when it arises in him. What are the five?

Loving-kindness can be maintained in being towards a person with whom you are annoyed: this is how annoyance with him can be removed.

Compassion can be maintained in being towards a person with whom you are annoyed; this too is how annoyance with him can be removed.

Onlooking equanimity can be maintained in being towards a person with whom you are annoyed; this too is how annoyance with him can be removed.

The forgetting and ignoring of a person with whom you are annoyed can be practiced; this too is how annoyance with him can be removed. Ownership of deeds in a person with whom you are annoyed can be concentrated upon thus: “This good person is owner of his deeds, heir to his deeds, his deeds are the womb from which he is born, his deeds are his kin for whom he is responsible, his deeds are his refuge, he is heir to his deeds, be they good or bad.” This too is how annoyance with him can be removed.

These are the five ways of removing annoyance, by which annoyance can be entirely removed in a bhikkhu when it arises in him.

References: http://www.accesstoinsight.org/

Photo Credits

 The Microsoft Office Clip Art Collection

You Annoy Me, Now Kindly Let Me Love You is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

“The Angels are here now …”

The clock illuminated 2:30am, “the Angels are here now” he repeated. He was sleeping next to his sister and the angels had come to see them. Was it because for the last two days I could see a sort of sullen return to her eyes again, the kind of glaze that only appeared when her sister was on her mind. I wanted to hold her hand for hours on end to let her know that her mother was going to be there every step of the way to comfort and guide her. She wouldn’t let me though, the moment was brief when she would show emotion, but inside I knew the missing piece was affecting her again.

I struggled daily as a mother to take away her pain and sadness, but there was only so much I could do to console her young heart. The silent tears had returned and it was as though her baby brother could feel the lonely return as he lay next to her sleeping. I watched them sleeping, hoping she could find peace while she slept. Had the angels come to wipe away her tears too, like I so often found myself doing when she would let me?

“The Angels are here” he said, and then the room was silent again.

Photo Credit

William Adolphe Bouguereau – Song of the Angels (1881) – Public Domain

Silent Tears #2 is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

The majority of women I have been in relationships with have had insecurity around their weight. It hasn’t mattered whether they were actually larger or decidedly thin, the perception of being “fat” – and thus unattractive – was often palpable. As a man who pays attention to limiting cultural constructs around relationships, and who doesn’t go with the oppressive flow, I often have found myself in a strange place when it comes to weight.

In response to “I’m fat” comments, I have offered compliments. Or flat out rejections of the statement. Or sometimes have simply said “I love you as you are.”

No doubt it’s good to have a partner who isn’t harping on you about weight, but at the end of the day, you have to believe it internally.

At the same time, there are powerful social biases which make this internal self acceptance challenging. It’s easy to find pseudo-scientific articles in magazines and newspapers defending the status quo of attractiveness. Which tends to revolve around white bodies in general, and with women in particular, tends to revolve around being young and thin. In other words, there are cultural reasons why black women in general tend to struggle to get dates, for example, and why women with larger, curvier bodies tend to get rejected or tossed into the friend-zone. And it’s not just a heterosexual thing. These same pattern can be found, at least to some degree, amongst gay, lesbian, trans and queer relationships as well.

On the other two blogs I maintain, I have been writing a lot about the general disconnect so many of us have with the Earth. This disconnect manifests not only in how we humans treat the planet, but also in how we see and experience our bodies. Body hatred is intimately tied to both the oppression of women and rejection of Earth as the source of life, abundance, and creation.

And so, a larger woman might be able to find a partner who loves her for who she is, but if she hasn’t unpacked the internalized oppression around body image, she might do everything in her power – usually unconsciously – to undermine the relationship. On the flip side, if the partner has chosen her mostly for her personality, he or she might end up undermining the relationship with body shaming, or associated negative behaviors. Sometimes, it takes years for this kind of stuff to emerge. Couples can be seemingly happy together, only to wake up one day to an outburst of anger and confusion that slowly, or rapidly tears them apart.

While I fully believe that our desires shift and change over the years, and that sometimes we naturally drift away from partners, it’s also true in other cases that busted up relationships become that way primarily due to unexamined assumptions and views. Because we live in our bodies, and literally store unprocessed experience in our bodies – there’s no way around it. In order to have conscious, thriving relationships, you have to learn to love your body, and feel the flow of life coming through you. Learning to love includes everything from choosing to lose weight if necessary, to standing tall and proud as you are, today, regardless of what others might think. It also means learning to liberate your desires from the narrow confines of the “proper” or “expected,” while also balancing that with a deep commitment to non-harming.

Image Credit

“Fat Bottomed Girls Again” @ Flickr

Dating While “Fat” is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

A happy marriage or partnership is good for the soul with studies now showing that we can even live longer if we’re lucky enough to be in a good or happy marriage. Our media and society seems obsessed with celebrities hooking up and having babies. But it feels at times that the media is even more obsessed with marriage failures and relationship break ups. Our human instincts or “soul’s purpose” programs us to crave intimacy and companionship from our mate. For females there is an even stronger urge to reproduce and have happy and healthy children. But as someone who is presently having marriage counseling I am amazed at how much I have learned – not only about my partner and some of the underlying issues causing problems within, but the basics about partner relationships. For example, stages of relationships and how to effectively communicate with your partner. It almost seems comical to me that while good marriages and partnerships are the building blocks to a healthy community, it has taken me a lot of time and money to invest in something that is key to my soul’s happiness.

I’m not sure about your schooling days, but my catholic school was great at teaching us about religion, different types of religion and the essentials such as science and maths. I suppose society leaves the example of healthy, positive relationships to the role of our parents and families. The difficulty for me growing up, hence the need for intensive relationship therapy now, was my dysfunctional family and parental relationship role model. Every time I read statics about marriage failure in society (is it half or one third that end in divorce these days?) it makes me realize how many other children are by-products of not only separated parents but children growing up in dysfunctional family units. Surely it would help to teach children at a school age level about effective communication and the fundamentals of how healthy positive relationships work? If our core values of society, or collective souls share the common need to formulate healthy partnerships how can adults be expected to achieve this without tools and understanding? While I feel privileged to afford the cost of psychotherapy I realize that my relationship would have probably been another divorce statistic if I didn’t live in a 1st world country and have resources available.

Most children participate in some extra curricular study such as learning to play a musical instrument or sports. If there was a course available to children, whether it was included in their schools academic program or on a volunteering basis, it would be great to see those precious little souls educated on topics such as conflict solutions and skills to exemplify positive communication between parents and children. I realize these days children are already burdened and overloaded with school pressures, but a course that was designed to cater to each child’s age that was interesting and interactive could help them identify and understand family dynamics and how these impact them. As a small child I rarely saw my parents verbally argue but the underlying and unresolved relationship issues festered and left me feeling powerless and frustrated. Therapy has helped me understand how my parent’s poor communication has impacted my marriage and life. It feels like children are more pressured to achieve high scores and university placements, but you really have to wonder where our priorities for our community really do lie.

Photo Credit

Photo by Florence Stroud – All Rights Reserved

Guest Author Bio

Florence Stroud
Discussion of the real issues in life and insightful writing that really deals with true human experience is what interests me.

Currently looking at the ideas expressed on the World Transformation Movement website.

Blog / Website: www.worldtransformation.com

Happy Marriage Happy Soul is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

I recently read a great article by Gil Namur called Whatever happened to Hi and Cheers. He’s observed that people, in general, are becoming increasingly business-like and less polite in face-to-face and especially electronic interactions. He feels that this as a setback for human relationships.

I’m inclined to agree with him. I’ve seen lots of instances myself where people are increasingly failing to be more considerate to one other. In fact, I hear less and less people saying “sorry” these days.

Consider these:

1) A cashier at a huge supermarket chain shortchanged me after I paid for my groceries. Fortunately, I decide to double-check the receipt before I leave and discover the error. I point this out to her and guess what happens? She just looks at me and gives me the $5.00 that was due to me and acts as if nothing unusual has happened. Does this encourage me to come back? No it doesn’t. It just gives me more reasons to shop elsewhere.

2) I go up to the counter of a coffee shop and there are five employees behind it who are busy – or trying to busy themselves – with various things other than serving me. I had been standing there for nearly two minutes before a waitress from the main area decides to go to the back of the counter herself to take my order as she has noticed the indifference of her colleagues. None of the original five, who eventually, turn around to face the lineup of customers that has accumulated makes an apology. Will I ever come back to this place? Probably not … (but I’d hire the waitress, though).

I’m not sure if parents are teaching their kids these days not to bother with apologizing to others for anything anymore but when I was growing up, I remember that I didn’t only have to say “sorry” if I had caused some harm, I was supposed to actually repair the damage that I had rendered. When you’re 10 years old, this can be very hard to do. But I was taught to always do it and simply swallow my pride.

People understand that we’re all human and occasionally make mistakes. Sorry only paves the way for us to remind each other how important we are to one another. By totally removing this step, we end up making it more difficult to live with one another and even allow resentment to build up and fester. That’s why I encourage clients (and especially people close to me) to tell me when I’ve messed up. That way, I can fix it. It’s much harder when you don’t know that you’ve caused other people hurt, then for them to be silent about it and then simply write you off. There’s no way that you can repair the damage in the second case.

These days, I get more and more blank stares from people who cause some type of error or generate some inconvenience or displeasure, and I struggle to understand if it’s because:

1. They hate their job
2. They hate their life
3. They hate dealing with people
4. They just don’t care
5. They don’t have a clue

I prefer to give people the benefit of the doubt and think that it’s #5. That part can be rectified. But if it’s anything from #1 to #4, then I suppose it’s my tough luck if I end up facing people with this type of attitude. And for the poor business owner who isn’t aware that this is happening, well, I’d wager that their company probably won’t be around for very long. In a highly competitive business climate where there also happens to be a huge recession going on, people can – and will – take their business elsewhere where they can get proper respect as paying customers.

What similar “no sorry” experiences have you undergone lately that have stuck in your head? Do they irritate you? Or do you feel that this trend is simply a necessary price that people have to pay for progress and/or the pace of life getting faster?

Photo Credit

I’m Sorry by HalfChinese on Flickr – Some Rights Reserved

Guest Author Bio

George Verdolaga
George Verdolaga is an author, educator and speaker. He helps people get out of their own way so that they can reach their career and lifestyle goals faster and more efficiently via The Job Farmer and The Contractor Lifestyle books and his Sitting Pretty Course.

Read his blog here and be sure to subscribe to his e-Newsletter.

Blog / Website: Verdolaga Learning Systems

Have We Thrown Sorry Out The Window? is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

FATHER’S WAKE

Yesterday, we buried apa, my father.

Today, I sit with people I do not know. Attend
a Mother’s Day brunch at the Hungarian Church hall.
Courtland township beside Lake Erie. Muddy, unpaved
roads: listening to the cimbalom. The zither.

Only yesterday we were singing a requiem to him.

“Your father bought the tickets,” mother says.
My son sitting beside me. Mama and eldest sister Erna
from Los Angeles, niece Teresa, on her right.

Today, we ate crisp, round bread
baked in wood-burning ovens,
and we ate it spread with fresh sweet butter.
Filled blue stoneware plates with goulash.
Homemade galuska. Cabbage rolls. Coffee. Mocha torte.

Yesterday, the priest said:
“Who are the children of Josef Martonfi?
Wait inside the door. I will tell you when to walk in.”
Father’s coffin on their shoulders,
pallbearers carried apa into church.
Organ music and choral voices.

Today, we listen to sounds of Gypsy violinists.
Boot-slapping and quick spinning. The czardas dance.
Couples dressed in traditional costumes.

Yesterday, we buried father in the Tillsonburg Cemetery.

I wept on my apa’s grave.

 Photo Credit

© Ilona Martonfi

First posted at Blue Skies Poetry

Guest Author Bio

Ilona Martonfi
Ilona Martonfi, author of Blue Poppy, (Coracle Press, 2009), has published in numerous magazines and journals including Vallum, Poetry Quebec, The Fiddlehead and Serai. Poet, editor, teacher. Founder and producer of The Yellow Door and Visual Arts Centre Readings, co-founder of Lovers and Others. Martonfi won the QWF 2010 community award.

Blog / Website: https://profiles.google.com/

Father’s Wake is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

I recently discovered I have been investing my time in a carp.

I can’t say that I was dating a carp because there was so much grey area and vague communication from the other side that my only way to describe the interaction between this man and I would be to say I was investing MY time. Now you’re wondering … why would you be investing time in a carp, which would be a fish right? You are correct a carp is a fish, but a useless fish. One that when it is caught can basically serve a few purposes. The first to be left on the shore to rot and the other to be cut up and used for fertilizer in a person’s garden or for other fish to feed on. Due to the fact that I don’t have a garden, I have always left them on the shore to rot when I have gone fishing. Now when we are talking dating terms the same rule applies, USELESS.

Back to the carp. So I was investing my time in a man who was lacking communication, wasn’t sure after 3 months if he was into me and kept me a secret from those in his life. There was no intimacy on an adult level. There were several moments of me catching him in lies or false truths. He was really amazing at twisting situations to make it like I was the one who was misinterpreting things. He clearly was more interested in leaving his options open for the possibility at something better than taking a chance with me, and although I was able to see through it, I allowed myself to give him the benefit of the doubt.

My point in all this ladies is that there was never a kiss that took my breath away and gave me butterflies. There was never a desire to know him on a deeper level. I didn’t find myself laughing until I cried. He lacked the ability to keep up with my witty charm and at the end of our time together, I never found myself totally blown away because I had just had the time of my life. He looked good on paper. He was educated, we had the same belief system on spirituality, he had a strong sense of the importance of family, we had a ton of mutual friends, and there was the potential for him to be great. He just wasn’t. He was a carp. He preferred talking about how great he is and all the things he has going for him in life …which were very few. He never complimented me and never seemed interested in what I had going on in my life. So I decided to flush him.

It was time to get back to fishing. There are plenty of fish in the sea … good, yummy, pretty, useful fish. If you find yourself in this situation, remember lovelies; you deserve to be passionately kissed, you deserve to laugh, you deserve to be complimented and most of all you deserve to be bragged about to the world! You should never be a secret. A man should be proud to say he is dating you and you should know the definitions and lines of where you stand in each others lives.

If you find yourself in a similar situation, do like I did and FLUSH THE CARP!

Photo Credit

Photo is from the Brooklyn Museum - no known copyright restrictions

Flush The Carp! is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

Young friends of mine were about to be married. The groom-to-be, Kyoshi, had been buddies with my own son since early childhood; he’d brought his fiancée, Christie, home to Cortes Island to meet close family friends before the wedding. This thoughtful and savvy young woman won our hearts around the dinner table, asking, “What advice do you have for two people beginning married life together?”

What a provocative question! How often is our wisdom invited to dinner? Christie’s question caught hold of me. Having recently uncoupled, I decided to do some more research on the subject, an informal survey of women beyond the dinner table. In all honesty, I wanted to see how my former partner had or had not measured up. The survey question that formed was this: What are the qualities of your husband that have sustained your marriage over the long term?

Women loved being asked the question. I wanted to know what keeps a marriage out of the red and in the black; where there is more credit than debit on both sides. It’s easy to feel when one is in this kind of company and so obvious to sense when not. The gut just knows. But what is it?

The qualities distilled down to four:

First. Kindness. Unfailing kindness. Kindness inherent in one’s nature. Or cultivated on purpose.

Second. Generosity. Both generosity of spirit and generosity of shared material things and resources. No tit for tat account keeping here.

Third. Sense of humour. Shared sense of humour, a critical distinction. Laughing together and taking life lightly at times seemed to ensure the most durable bond.

The fourth quality each woman described in her own way. Essentially, their husbands hold a bigger field or perspective in which the wives can simply be themselves. The husbands weren’t knocked off kilter by her moods, changing mind, or her discomfort. It reminded me of my friend Steve, a life-long sailor, who says that when there is no wind, and the sails are luffing, you continue to remain vigilant and attentive though not actively so. In fact cool detachment is best; then when the wind does pick up you’re ready to respond and follow the air current. In a nutshell, the men give the women both a comforting containment and a liberating spaciousness.

On the first anniversary of their marriage, Kyoshi and Christie came home and we found ourselves gathered around the dinner table again. After reporting the survey results, to my delight Christie replied that if I was thinking about getting married again it would be more useful to ask the question of the husbands. Touché!

So over the months to come I asked the men: What are the qualities of your wife that have sustained your marriage?

This time around it was not only fun, it was enlightening listening to a man relating what he values about his wife, voluntarily, without resistance or cajoling. Usually the wives were present too, though silent. I found startling consistency of the first three qualities across the men and the women. Kindness. Generosity. Shared sense of humour.

The fourth quality is distinctly different for men. I had expected to hear something like, “She accepts me as I am.” It was quite the contrary; acceptance is the small end of the spectrum.

“She wants to know me, she is curious about how I am feeling, what I am thinking, what my experience is, and accepts all of me. I feel safe and cared for in a deep way. She brings out the best in me and I’d be a lesser person without her”.

This was nothing about “doing” and all about listening. The women paid attention without criticism or triggered reaction. What an accomplishment! I found for myself clarity about what makes a relationship tick along in a life enhancing direction.

What’s more compelling, though, is what happens when two lovers, in the broadest sense of the word, find their value reflected by the other. These spontaneous informal conversations brought something else too— the gift of being in the presence of this order of love, and experiencing it as a beneficiary even.

Witnessing a woman hearing her husband talk about what he values in her, often things she has not heard outright; seeing a man receive affirmation of his capacity to love—these are tender moments, sacred reflections leaving an enduring impression on each of us in the conversation.

Blessings to Christie and Kyoshi for having sparked a quest to define married love. When I have shared the wisdom of my long-wedded friends with younger ones on the threshold of marriage, the response has been one of awe and gratitude.

Photo Credit

Photo By Oriane Lee Johnston – All Rights Reserved

Guest Author Bio

Oriane Lee Johnston
Born in Ocean Falls and still based on the west coast of British Columbia, Canada, Oriane Lee’s life journeys have taken her from meditating in a Buddhist monastery in Burma, to trail riding in the mountains of Ecuador.

After fifteen years as program director for Hollyhock.ca, in 2005 she began to combine horse wisdom with the human heart in leadership and personal development programs. The spirit of horses led her to Africa, in 2010 volunteering with Mozambique Horse Safari, then on to a wildlife safari on horseback that changed her perspective about humans and nature. She is now involved with the Horses-in-Africa project documenting the Mavuradonha Wilderness of Zimbabwe. Where, amazingly, she can do tarot readings by skype for her clients in North America.

Oriane Lee has published in several online journals including Equitrekking.com and Izilwane.org. When in Canada, she lives in a horse sanctuary on Vancouver Island.

Blog / Websites: www.orianelee.com and www.oljtarot.com

Four Foundations of Sustaining a Fulfilling Marriage is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN