One of our key Upside Life messages is about developing and maintaining financial well-being through adequate saving coupled with living within our means and buying items when we can afford them.

National Public Radio Economic commentator Beth Kobliner gave what I would consider some of the best advice about saving and spending: “Make it easy to save and harder to spend.”  She calls it the Do it Yourself Bailout.  Her practical and common-sense suggestions, backed up by behavior research include the following:

1. SET YOUR CELL PHONE OR COMPUTER TO REMIND YOU TO SAVE. A 2010 study by economists from Harvard and Yale and co-authored by Jonathan Zinman of Dartmouth found that bank customers who were reminded of their savings goals with monthly text messages stashed away six percent more money than those who didn’t receive reminders. So set your calendar on your Blackberry or an alarm on your cell phone to remind you of your goals. Use post-its, refrigerator magnets, screensavers, mobile alerts—whatever works for you. More simply, contact your bank and ask them to automatically withdraw a set amount—say $50 or $100 a month—out of your checking account after each pay period and have it transferred to savings.
2. DON’T LET YOUR COMPUTER MAKE IT TOO EASY TO SPEND. With popular websites like Gilt Groupe, Groupon, and RueLaLa offering deep discounts to your favorite retailers, you don’t even have to leave your desk in order to blow money on shopping sprees. Erase your credit card information from tempting sites, don’t allow them to save your passwords, and delete bookmarks to places where you’re likely to spend. But do use sites like bankrate.com to get the lowest rate on credit cards and billshrink.com to see if there’s a better cell phone or wireless plan for you.
3. USE CASH NOT PLASTIC. A classic 2001 study from MIT found that people were willing to pay twice as much for the same items when they paid with credit cards compared to when they paid with cash. So stick to an all-cash diet. Another 2008 study by Priya Personal Raghubir of NYU and Joydeep Srivastava of the University of Maryland, found that people tend to treat credit cards and gift cards like “monopoly money”—meaning that plastic feels less real and people are less careful about overspending with it. Take out a fixed amount of cold, hard, cash from the ATM each week and hold yourself to that sum of money to get you through the week.
4. CHECK YOUR EMOTIONS. Research from British psychologists done in 2009 and other studies by American psychologists has found that we’re willing to spend more money when emotions run rampant. In fact, in one famous study from Carnegie Mellon, participants who’d been shown a tearjerker about a dying parent were willing to fork over almost four times more for a bottle of water, compared to people who’d been shown a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef. Save your shopping for your mellow moods.
5. SHOP WITH FRUGAL FRIENDS. Studies show that friends (and even friends-of-friends) influence everything from how much you weigh to how much you smoke. And at least some unpublished preliminary research seems to show that friends can influence how you can spend as well. Next time you’re planning a big-ticket purchase, bring a frugal pal shopping with you. Take your spendthrift friends on a run instead.

Questions for Discussion:

1. What success have you had in curbing your spending over the last 18 months?
2. How successful have you been in saving for the future?
3. Please share any tips or strategies you’re using below with other Upside Life readers in the “comments” section . . .

Steve Goldberg is the co-author of Finding the Upside:  Practical Wisdom for Challenging Times.  You can read more about and purchase the book at:  www.findingtheupside.org

Make It Easier to Save and Harder to Spend is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

I would walk in, the cold bite of winter pouring out of my breath as the warm steam of coffee smells lingered in the worn vinyl seats that I scanned, looking for an empty spot. Coats, toques, mitts would topple down onto the green canvas bag that defined my student life and I would shake out the bright red hair tangled around my shoulders knowing that soon I would be able to cozy up to the word, my pen scratching thoughts as I drank in the fragrant cup of coffee set before me.  Friends would come in, their cheeks bright as they went through the routine of ordering and settling in, and conversation would swirl mingling with the cream of laughter.

There is an independent coffee shop that I regularly go to if I meet with friends to catch up or if I have set aside some time to cozy up to my laptop and do some writing outside of the house. But in my day-to-day of life and work, I grab my coffee at one of the many chain coffee shops that litter the streets downtown. I can hit at least four different ones in a one block radius. I line up and chat with a colleague  then try and remember which coffee shop I am at so that I use the right terminology because a ‘medium’ is never just a ‘medium’ anymore unless you are in the coffee shop that uses ‘medium’ cups and they will be quick to tell you if you inadvertently say the wrong thing.  I dish out my change, just over two dollars generally unless I am in the mood for a frappadappa ding dong or a latte hold the sweet and please use skim thank you very much and then I hand over five dollars give or take a few cents. I am usually pretty good at using my handy dandy to-go cup, one of many that litter my desk at work and I try to be matchy matchy and bring the right-labeled generic cup to the appropriately labeled coffee shop so I don’t offend anyone with the notion that I am cheating with the shop down the street. The whole ordeal pretty much takes up all the time of my coffee break but I’m used to that now.

I actually own a pretty fancy coffee maker that can be programmed the night before and will even grind the beans fresh before brewing the pot. It’s a gleaming shiny piece of kitchen accessory that I dust on a regular basis and use infrequently. On the weekend, as I pushed my shopping cart, chewing on the ragged nail of my index finger, finding myself annoyed with that one wheel that always want to go off in its own direction when it would be so much simpler to follow the other wheels (what is with that wheel and how do I always find the one cart that has an errant wheel?), I almost missed the sale sign as I reached wearily for a new bag of fair trade roasted fairly locally coffee beans. A six dollar savings meant the bag of coffee would only cost me ten dollars. I do love a good sale and this was a good sale so I got a little bit crazy in the end bought eighty dollars worth of coffee. Um. Yeah.

I got home giddy and slightly nauseated as I realized what I had done. We don’t really drink enough coffee to warrant this sort of crazy binge. Do we? And then my head became one of those screens with numbers floating by brightly illuminated like one of those genius characters on crime shows … only I am far from genius. Doing the most conservative estimates, I calculate that my husband and I spend at least five dollars a day on coffee as we trudge through the line ups waiting to be refilled as we dash about our days. This means that in just over two weeks, we have spent eighty dollars. If we make a pot of coffee a day, it will take us approximately two and a half months to use up the coffee that I spent eighty dollars on. So basically I save two months worth of coffee for an approximate total of … three hundred dollars. Three hundred dollars!!  At this point my breathing got a little shallow because I know that this is a conservative estimate that doesn’t take into account any of the latte extravaganzas that I can quickly rack up in a week.

I remember my grandfather’s thermos, worn and chipped and filled with a steaming hot brew of coffee every morning for as long as I could remember. Coffee shops were places where my mother went to meet her friends and chat and laugh in steamed cream conversation much like my days as a student. Otherwise she drank coffee at home or it was bundled up in a thermos for the ride. I have a grande collection of to-go cups, some ceramic and some encased in steel but if I search the cupboards of my mind, I can’t come up with a good old fashioned thermos.  That is about to change because I realized that on top of being able to bank some extra money, I might actually have some time on my coffee breaks to pull out my notebook and scratch out some words.

A Cup of Coffee is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

I rented the movie Wall Street this week. Do you remember it?

It was an Oscar-winner from 1987, directed by Oliver Stone and starring Michael Douglas as an incredibly wealthy but unscrupulous trader. It also starred Charlie Sheen as a young, desperately-eager-to-make-it-big stockbroker. I wanted to remind myself of the movie and its plot because the sequel Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps has just been released into the theatres, with Michael Douglas playing the same character of Gordon Gekko.

In watching the original, I found it to be just “okay,” with a predictable plot line. But that’s not to say I didn’t enjoy myself. Because, let me tell you, I did!

No, it wasn’t from chuckling at the brick-sized cell phones or the largesse of the women’s hair styles. It was the countless handsome young men in this movie — all wearing suits. Handsome. Tailored. Suits.

It made me yearn for a time when men wore suits regularly. Now I only see a man in a suit (including my own) at weddings or funerals. And it’s a real shame, because a suit on a man is a beautiful thing.

And then I got to thinking about this whole “business casual” thing. Who came up with business casual anyway? I’d like to know so that I can tell them what a major disservice they have done for me — and women everywhere.

I think men look good in two types of clothing: casual (Levi jeans and a t-shirt) or formal (a good suit). No matter what size a man is, I think these two types of wear can be universally flattering.

Notice that this doesn’t include “business casual.” I have yet to see a man look good wearing “business casual.” Have you? All I seem to see are men that look like this:

Neither the “proper” or “improper” forms of business casual in this image do anything for me.

I really just think business casual was a bad idea. Even for women. I would personally prefer to wear a business suit every day. It would actually make things so much simpler for me because one never needs to worry about trying to match a suit together! Just go into a store, buy the suit — voila! — an outfit. Same process applies for the closet in the morning. Love it.

In fact, the idea of working in a “suit only” environment is so appealing, I would consider it a major employment perk. More handy, certainly, than a gym facility I would never use anyways (despite many a lofty intention otherwise!). Besides, a gym wouldn’t even be necessary if people wore well-tailored suits that comfortably covered any of the lumps and bumps our middle-aged bodies may have.

Instead, one never knows these days what kind of atrocities they will face when walking into the office … will it be leggings? flip flops? skinny jeans? or just the sad, defeated look of men in pleated khaki pants.

Business Casual: Wall Street Awakens Nostalgia for Sharp-Dressed Men is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

Just when I think Corporate America can’t sink any lower, they drop a socially unacceptable anchor that takes them deeper.

I was perusing the Finance section of the Yahoo website and came across an article supplied by Chris Isidore (senior writer for CNNMoney.com) entitled, “Out of Work Job Applicants told Unemployed Need Not Apply.”

I was shocked to learn the latest hiring practices being initiated into the corporate structure. A “headhunter” with a prominent employment agency was discussing the current trend in the industry.

It seems employers of today are refusing to interview applicants who are “presently unemployed.” Let me repeat, employers with viable positions that need to be filled in order to move their companies forward are refusing to interview candidates who are “presently unemployed.”

The reason given for this shift in thinking also does not sit well with me. If a candidate was released from a previous job, it probably was due to their position on the low rung of the performance ladder. In other words, a huge assumption is being made that their performance, or lack there of, is what produced their termination.

How can a potential employer know that if the job seeker isn’t granted an interview to plead his or her case?

I think this interpretation is skewed because it has been proven that employees who job-hop are more of a liability to an organization due to the time and energy expended to train them. In these economic times of high unemployment, people who have jobs are desperately trying to keep them, not get rid of them. So to offer employment opportunities only to people with jobs seems asinine.

What happened to the philosophy of “not kicking a man when he’s down”?

The plight of the jobless continues to dim. I thought subjecting people who were out of work for any period of time to credit checks was rock bottom.

Human capital experts say that it’s necessary if the position requires the handling of money. Okay, I’ll accept that; I don’t agree with it, but I’ll accept it.

But what about the non-money handling positions, for instance, in the maintenance and construction fields? If you’ve been out of work for a couple of years, there’s a pretty good chance that you wouldn’t have a stellar credit score.

And how can you restore your credit score if you’re not given the opportunity to interview for a position that would help pay your debt?

With so many companies downsizing, rightsizing and completely folding, whose performance record should really be evaluated?

When greed and ego danced the Enron tango, the company collapsed and taught hundreds of employees to do the unemployment shuffle.

So why would anyone believe these employees were inadequate in their positions? How could they be rejected and labeled “low performers”? If this is becoming the new norm, BP employees should start looking now before their company goes belly up!

What infuriates me the most about these unscrupulous tactics is that they are perfectly legal. Not ethical, but legal. And the irony of it all is the people being denied the privilege of interviewing will be the very ones targeted by marketing firms (at least until the unemployment checks run out) to satisfy the gluttony of the shareholders.

So tell me, Corporate America, what must a jobless person do to be employed by you?

Buddy, Can You Spare A Job? is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

People often search for a life/work balance — but the equation may be simpler than we once thought. As my husband pointed out in a conversation over lunch today, everybody is either producing something, or consuming something, all the time… and while some people we know spend most of their time consuming, he and I spend most of it producing, and then consume a little to balance it out.

In other words, let’s call people Creators and Consumers, with the understanding that most people are a combination of both.

If you work, make art or run a household, you’re being a Creator while you do that: whether you create a product or supply a service for a company, or you write music for an album, or you create sandwiches for a lunchbox, you’re giving value to somebody through that action.

If you purchase groceries, watch television, or get social assistance from the government, you’re being a Consumer while you do that. Essentially, you’re getting value from somebody else’s contribution.

It’s interesting that the internet is kind of like the perfect two-sided coin: it’s equally full of Creators offering content to read or watch, or things for sale; and Consumers reading and watching the content, and buying products.

Now, here’s where it gets interesting as far as balance is concerned: everybody who serves as a Creator is also a Consumer. You can’t just create, create, create (or work, work, work) without stopping now and then to consume some food, or some entertainment, or even the use of a bed to sleep in for a few hours.

But it seems that not everybody who’s a Consumer is also a Creator. For example, a retired grandmother who knits hats for her grandkids, bakes pies for the neighbors, or even plays chess with a neighbor to brighten his day is a Creator, because she’s giving value. But someone who’s unemployed and just sits on the couch all day watching TV, and then goes out to the bar for a few beers, is not creating anything; he’s a hardcore Consumer.

Sometimes the Creator/Consumer relationship can balance out over a lifetime, like when someone works 40 hours a week until the age of 70, and then retires and chooses to just relax or travel for the next 25 years. Someone else might take care of a family for 30 years, and then get injured and need her family to take care of her.

But I know a few people who spend all their energy trying to be in a position to be full-time Consumers; they don’t want to Create, and they take advantage of any opportunity to avoid it. I think that’s where things get a little skewed and unbalanced.

See, it’s a universal law that value exchange is an important part of life. Wallace D. Wattles talked about it in his classic 1910 self-help book, The Science of Getting Rich (since revamped by The Secret’s Bob Proctor, Jack Canfield and Michael Beckwith). The law is called by several names: the Law of Cause and Effect, the Law of Causation, the Law of Circulation, or the Law of Exchange. It’s the basis of Newton’s third law, and it’s one of the first things babies learn: doing one thing makes something else happen.

Wattles explains it this way: “It is a natural law that like causes always produce like effects, and, therefore, any man or woman who learns to do things in this certain way will infallibly get rich.” That’s because value out always results in value in, and it happens in a circulatory fashion — meaning that the person you Create for doesn’t necessarily provide what you Consume, but when you give someone value, you’ll get value from somebody else.

To keep this flow going, it’s important to be able to receive, whether that be gifts, compliments, or products, with confidence and appreciation. That allows the other person to give. And of course, it’s also important to give with confidence and appreciation, because that lets somebody else receive.

And that, in the end, is exactly what balance is about: giving and receiving, supplying and demanding, Creating and Consuming — equally and joyfully.

So now that I’ve finished Creating this article for you to Consume… I’m going to go Consume a magazine while you pass along value to someone else. Enjoy!

Photo Credits

Cuban musicians entertaining passersby © Matt J Phipps

Money represents value © D Borman

Finding Life Balance Through Creating and Consuming is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

I make my living as a waitress. I consider myself a professional. I find it’s a career choice that people are both intrigued and repelled by.

The restaurant industry is a strange one. It’s a whole different way of life. It’s not just the working evenings. It’s the mystery, the romance, the chaos, the stress. Working in a restaurant is like being in the theatre. The show must go on every night. The show must go on no matter how much you dread it.

When I put my apron on, I become my character. I am confidant and efficient, as friendly as I need to be, as good a listener as I’m asked to be — and happy to serve you. I am graceful and kind. I have spent years perfecting my act.

I am knowledgeable on hundreds of wines, every item on the menu and all the ingredients in them. I can recite all the dishes that are gluten-free, dairy-free, nut-free. I will take all your requests seriously. I will do everything in my power to ensure that your evening is not only pleasant, but excellent.

If you come to the restaurant more than three times I will remember you, your likes and dislikes, and I will make you feel special and appreciated. I treat everyone like a VIP. I will ask you about your holiday, how your renovations are coming along, if your sister had her baby, if you sold your car. I will have your martini waiting for you — one with a twist. I’ll buy you a drink on your anniversary. I will call you when you forget your scarf. I will take the chef’s anger when you ask to have all the sauces on the side and your steak well done.

I will do all these things while being paid minimum wage. I do all these things to insure proper service.

More than half of my income is earned in gratuities. I depend on people enjoying the experience I provide; if they don’t I don’t get paid. There aren’t very many jobs like that. It requires a thick skin. Sometimes things don’t go right. There are a variety of reasons that can happen. Most often it is simply a mistake. Customers are not very forgiving of mistakes. Some are downright cruel. I’ve had customers make me cry because they feel they have the right to insult me.

I have had many conversations about tipping. I feel pretty passionately about the subject. I’m not going to tell you how much or what percentage. I think we all know the etiquette.  Think of it as the applause after the curtain call.

Photo Credit

“Over a pizza” Yarden Sachs @ Flickr.com. Creative Commons. Some rights reserved.

Tipping the Balance is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN

It’s no secret to anyone that knows me that I’m a bit…well…frugal. This is not to be confused with cheap, because I’m not. I just don’t like to spend money foolishly or needlessly.

Despite my best efforts to become a spendthrift, it makes me feel so much more comfortable to know that I have a little nest egg squirreled away somewhere that I can keep adding to.

Because of this, I’ve become a bit of a do-it-yourselfer. I have no problem looking up repair information on the internet in order to fix something myself. In fact, I rather enjoy it. Of course this approach to home repairs has had some very mixed results.

Sometimes I triumphantly complete whatever it was that needed to be done. But sometimes…well, let’s just say that more than one repairman has looked at me quizzically, wondering how on earth what should have been a simple repair managed to become so complicated. (Naturally, I blame the failed-fix on my poor clueless husband…the one who suggested that I call a professional in the first place.)

There are other ways to save money as well. For instance, I’d much rather eat a home-cooked meal (assuming I can get someone else to prepare it for me) than eat out in any restaurant. As for seeing a movie…well, we probably shouldn’t go there. And don’t even get me started on the outrageous cost of adding a snack. I’m much more content to stay home watching a DVD and nibbling on microwave popcorn.

There is no doubt in my mind as to where this frugal tendency came from. It’s genetic. I’m convinced that there is a much overlooked frugality gene tucked away in my DNA somewhere. For proof of this, all you have to do it look at my mother. For years, I watched as she squeezed every penny she came across until it bled. (Of course, money was a bit more scarce back then…but still.)

As the years passed and my parents became more comfortable financially, Mom still squeezed those pennies. Her biggest nemesis was the price of gas. I still laugh at her when she compares gas prices. It doesn’t faze her one bit to drive miles out of her way in the quest to get the cheapest gas in town. If Mom does manage to find a station selling gas for a mere two cents cheaper than anywhere else, she is elated for days.

It shouldn’t be too surprising to learn that her father was the exact same way. Now in all fairness, Grandpa did grow up during the Great Depression. It’s well known that times were really tough during that era and folks had no choice but to live frugally. Although Grandpa learned how to stretch a dime at his father’s knee, I’m fairly certain that he would have lived thriftily no matter what.

Grandpa’s obsession in the later years of his life was the cost of milk. I can still remember him studying the weekly grocery store flyers to find out where the best sales on milk could be found. He would do all of his normal shopping at his favourite store, then drive ten miles to purchase milk that was five cents cheaper. Then, of course, well pleased with his savings, he would brag about it for days.

I have no way of knowing how far back this frugality gene goes, but I’m confident that it goes way back. It amuses me to envision some distant ancestor grunting over the high cost of mammoth and trying to figure out some way to go out and catch one himself for a mere fraction of the current bartering rate.

Every once in a while I still make an attempt to break free from my frugal disposition. After all, the gene is only on my maternal side — or so I have always thought. Just the other day, I realized that I may have been overlooking a less obvious victim of the frugality gene.

I was chatting with my Dad when he casually mentioned that he was going to head up to the nearest Naval Base to get his hair cut. I had to stop and think about that for a moment as it seemed so out of character. After all, there had to be a zillion barbershops much closer to where they were staying. Hesitantly, I asked him if there was anything else he was going to do at the Base, which was nearly an hour drive away. Dad replied that all he needed was a haircut that didn’t cost over eight bucks.

Hmmm…apparently I never stood a chance.

Photo Credits

“What’s in your piggy bank” Bei Shu Lan @ flickr. Creative Commons. Some rights reserved.

The Frugality Gene is a post from: LIFE AS A HUMAN